Yukoner's 2015 Psychological Journal

[Yukoner]

Hi, Yukoner.

I was reading your journals, I saw that you pass the combine (by the way congratulations) it is a dream for me been founded I hope some day I can get it.

I write you because I would like to know, if its not problem (may be is not the thread but was impossible to write you a PM) which is the procces that came after you pass the combine? I mean you said something about Live trading prep. Sometimes I see that when the traders are founded they spend some time between the combine and been founded, I think TST gives not enough information about it I hope you can help me with it.


Thanks

Hi Lajax,

I would suggest starting a different thread on this topic, and just tag me in it using the @Yukoner handle. I would be glad to help you. In a nutshell, once you pass a combine they have the choice of moving you directly to live trading... OR putting you into live trader prep which is similar to combine, but much smaller trading goals. That gives them a chance to review more of what you do as a trader.
http://help.topsteptrader.com/knowledgebase/articles/231897-what-is-live-trader-preparation-

Thanks for following my journal.

Yukoner

 

[Redneck]

Hey KP

We all have needs - which go way past wants..., desires..., hopes..., and dreams

So long as our needs are being met - there is no impetus to change

======

Further..., people only change for two reasons;

Either they are completely fed up with their current circumstances and can no longer stand to remain

or

There is a new set of circumstances which they desire (need) more than their current

The obvious question would be how you overcome it?

Is it just as simple as saying you're going to act in your own best interests moving forward

No.., it takes a commitment to overcome (change).., then and more importantly - it takes action - most times repeating this action..., as true change rarely comes about easily


But even before the commitment and action - we must need this change - iow it must fulfill a needs within us

Should this need not exist - then we must create that as well - else the change will never take hold

I remember reading somewhere that women who are in abusive relationships only leave once they have chosen to do what is necessary to leave because they want to.

Offering help to women in this situation is usually effort on the part of the helper that is wasted until she herself makes the conscious effort to do something about it.

I hope I'm not wrong with this, but this makes total sense to me.

We can lead a horse to water - but unless that horse thirsty - no way in hell to make it drink


No different for people

Do you think self-destructive behavior is similar in that a person will stop doing this to themselves only once they "own" the realization that they no longer want to damage themselves?

Yup


Some actually revel in self-destructive behavior - a martyrdom of sorts

I've never understood why

(ie. Its a simple choice, and once you make the choice to not do it, you stop. If you continue with self destructive behavior, it simply means that you're not ready to stop damaging yourself yet, and perhaps continue to do so in an effort to reach rock bottom.

As strange as it sounds, it does appear sometimes that people do want to see how far down they can go as opposed to seeing how high they can go.

(and when I say people, I'm certainly not excluding myself! ))

I have no doubt you are fully aware of that which you do..., initially I had doubts..., but no longer

You joke about it... yet other times appear so serious

I simply don't understand why - but then the why..., is really none of my business


As I constantly remind my kids - a person's actions - always speak louder than their words

Successful Journey - and may you find that which truly you seek


RN

 

[Redneck]

So my focus needs to stay on the process,

this is a job and my trading plan tells me what to do.

================


Monday I start a combine.

When these two in direct conflict - which rest assured they will be (like they were Friday)


Which one will win out

I need to get to the point of loving the process of what I am doing... making widjets... and the $$ of trading is just a by product.

the P&L is just the measuring stick of how successful the widget making is going.

If the $'s (PnL) is a byproduct - which is how it must be - then how can the byproduct also be a measuring stick

(measuring stick = that by which one grades / judges one doing their job)


We can do everything correctly - and still lose

We can do every conceivable thing wrong - and still make money

hellofa measuring stick - not to mention - goes directly toward trading one's PnL


RN

 

[jsmacksem]

When these two in direct conflict - which rest assured they will be (like they were Friday)


Which one will win out






If the $'s (PnL) is a byproduct - which is how it must be - then how can the byproduct also be a measuring stick

(measuring stick = that by which one grades / judges one doing their job)


We can do everything correctly - and still lose

We can do every conceivable thing wrong - and still make money

hellofa measuring stick - not to mention - goes directly toward trading one's PnL


RN

Great insigh RN. I would agree if you use PnL as measuring stick, this doesn't exactly show you Yukoner, whether you did your job well. Got other measuring sticks for that?

Can do your Job REALLY well, and still have a losing day.

-JS.

 

[Handle123]

Monday I am set to start a new combine.[/quote]

UPDATE: - having taken 24 hours, and thought through all of this some more, plus rereading the comments in this journal, there are a few conclusions I have drawn:

1) I had gotten overconfident, and was starting to count the chickens before they hatched. Feeling like I had this, and was moving up another level. (In hindsight now, that seems ridiculous) So I was not neutral.

2) This one may be significant... I love trading... I sincerely enjoy the challenge... and @Handle123 comments really made me think more about this. I need to get to the point of loving the process of what I am doing... making widjets... and the $$ of trading is just a by product. So my focus needs to stay on the process, and the P&L is just the measuring stick of how successful the widget making is going. This isn't entertainment or Trader Disneyland, this is a job and my trading plan tells me what to do.

3) I really need to adjust my trading plan. More on the money management side of things, so that I get a smoother equity curve. I can't trade for Topstep's 10 day requirement... I just have to trade what I know is the right thing to do. So no more swinging for the fences... if I knock one out of the park, it is only because I just stepped up to bat and did what I was supposed to do. So having said that...

4) I need to decrease my loss limit. So considering it this weekend, and I will have it decided by Monday, that I will change from $1000 a day to only $500 a day. My rational is when I go back and look at my days, I get over a $500 drawdown and its just not a good day. I would be far better off to just stop, and wait for the next day.

5) My winning trades are fairly consistent at being about double the dollar amount of my losing trades. This is a positive.

6) I need to establish a trailing max drawdown for each trading day. An example, would be if I get over $500 profit for the day, I stop trading if it goes back down to $250.

7) I need to get comfortable with the fact that inside me every day, like @Redneck says, is the self-destructive behavior necessary to blow up your account. I knew that was possible, but wrongly assumed it would eventually go away as one becomes a better and better trader.

Monday I am set to start a new combine.

98% of my Trade Plan in money management, you can get in anywhere as an example, but the after is where you make or lose money. I want consistency, something everyday and most likely enough so when I have losing day I have cut it short to stop so day before has covered the losses, I don't want my equity curve to take a huge hit wiping out weeks of work. I think just cause Combine had $1000 limit, you should never get close to it, am sure they not too happy when you get close al the time.

I just like stopping on a high note but based on my stats, I detest last trade I take was a loser, now use alarm clock to let me know when I am suppose to quit, I get so concentrated, whole day would go by when I just wanted to trade 90 minutes, LOL.

Am sorry if some of my posts come off strong, just want the best for you, but this is tough business, you not competing against others, it is always first competing within yourself, once you can trade "numb", leave ego and fears at the door, you will do better, some losses as system losses, no biggie, but when losses happen cause of yourself, you have to quit for the day, twenty minute break is not going to cure the time you need to penalize yourself. Now go to chalkboard and write 200 times "I won't violate MM rules".

I think people make major changes in their lives when the pain is so great they can't keep doing. We tend to often take the easy direction in life, when the harder is usually correct way to do right, takes longer but at least we don't have to keep redoing it.

 

[k p]

You joke about it... yet other times appear so serious

I simply don't understand why - but then the why..., is really none of my business


As I constantly remind my kids - a person's actions - always speak louder than their words

Successful Journey - and may you find that which truly you seek

RN

Thanks for the reply.

I don't mean to joke about it, and I do take all of this seriously. I think what I'm trying to get across more is sarcasm. What is so obvious and the right thing to do is incredibly difficult in the moment. So in some ways, I'm both shocked at how much my actions differ from what I intend, but at the same time I want to be kind to myself and just accept what happened versus beat myself up. So my emoticons try and capture this, unsuccessfully I guess.

But since this is Yokoner's journal, there isn't any point in saying more other than that this is a great discussion!

 

[monoid]

I need to get to the point of loving the process of what I am doing... making widjets... and the $$ of trading is just a by product. So my focus needs to stay on the process, and the P&L is just the measuring stick of how successful the widget making is going.
......

Hello Yukoner:

I want to bring focus back to your quote on widgets as a lead off to my question.

@Redneck, has addressed this every point, but I take a little bit larger view. I think one should differentiate between the widget itself, and the process of making the widget. PnL is a valid measuring stick to monitor the viability of the widget [in the market place]. However, as others have pointed out (including @Redneck, @Handle123), the viability of the widget has nothing to do with the process of making the widget. Hence, to monitor the process of making the widget, PnL is not a valid measure.

As traders, we have to monitor the viability of our trading plan (i.e., widget), and our ability to execute our trading plan (i.e., the process of making the widget). Which means we need both PnL and other metrics, but with the understanding that PnL is used as a measuring stick to only validate our trading plan; and, this analysis of our trading plan is a post-market activity. NOTE: To be exact on the use of PnL as a metric, according to me, absolute value of PnL is not important, but the sign of PnL (positive or negative) is the metric needed to validate a trading plan. I could elaborate, but this is not the point of this post.

So, my question is simple: Do you really have a trading plan? By trading plan, I mean a plan with all its 'T's crossed and 'I's dotted, not just a good idea. You would never start a widget assembly line with a few missing bolts and loose nuts would you?

From what I read in your journal, I get a feeling that you either don't have a complete trading plan (production line is not complete) or that your trading plan is too loose leaving you to make decisions on the fly during trading (production line with lose and missing nuts). But I could be totally wrong. Only you will know.

'The old cat said "Technique is important, and without technique there can be nothing. However, technique by-itself is not enough"' - A translation of the 'Mysterious skill of the Old Cat' [Neko no Myōjutsu written by Issai Chozan in 1727]

All the best with the new combine.

Regards,
Monoid.

 

[Yukoner]

****​

I am humbled by the support and compassion shown to me in this journal.... they know who they are....

THANK YOU!​

****​

 

[satchel]

Smaller targets, Make the bell ring marty schwartz style more often. On my best bad days I clicked the flatten button quickly on smaller targets. It opens you up. On my worst bad days in the past I froze, got stubborn. Winners turned into losers (iceberg A state of inaction gets you into trouble, be in a state of pro action.

Also, remove the pressure of the combine or repeated combines. Trade a small account. When the day doesn't 'feel right' you stop trading, harder to do this when in the combine. Pressure to take trades, make the stats look good, meet a specific goal within a specific time frame.

You need advantages stacked in your favor, as many as possible. You know this already with limiting your distractions. So, remove the combine. Make a new journal. And Keep Journaling, you have one of the best reads in the journal section here!

 

[Stocks4life]

wow Yuk you have every trading vice in the book, I just finished teaching a friend how to trade NQ (he's trading live and doing well) but when he started he was keeping track of dollars on his charts (when the trade is active, and talking in dollars). It took a while but now he just shows points gained/loss and talks in points. I told him never to think in dollars, NEVER, NEVER!!!

So imo never think in dollars always points, days performance is in points, very simple did you have a 10-20 point day, 40-50 point day, a crazy 100+ knock em out the park day. That's all we talk about for a day performance. Can always figure dollar amount x number of contracts. I never found a reason for the scale in and scale out stuff, complicates stuff.

Figure out your trade setups I have 4 up and 4 down setups (keep it simple price action here), each one has it's own risks and required stops (and where they need to go).

Stops always in, and only move up. Know when to give your trade more room/time and when not too. Know your setups so well that you dream about them.

When the trade is live, every move up or down has what I call a standard trail protocol, when it's violated you are stopped out. Some trades run far some do not, you don't have control over this.

If I can't see one of my 8 setups then there is no trade. There is no greed, well maybe point greed but really have no control over that, depends on the day, the setups and how much the market give me in total points.

So you may want to think in points but I can see it may be hard to change. I would ditch the combine, there is no need to have extra stress to trigger your vices. Set a simple daily point goal for the day. It can be low to start with low stress.

S4L