Mr Miyagi sends you old school book reading for a timeless problem of discretionary trading for a cerebral person:
1) The Disciplined Trader
2) Trading in the Zone
Also keep a journal of each trade. Those executed and those not. Record how you feel, think and act before during and after the trade (or lack thereof).
Things to be consciously aware of step by step include your perceived risk / reward before the trade (bear with me while i ramble) - - you must have a hard stop loss and a profit target - - monitor how and why you FEEL you made (or want to make) the trade for things like: been too long since you had a trade and need to feel the action or feel like you are in control, you feel left out of a good trade and chased the market, aggressively making up for losses; charity trade (laziness and overconfidence) after a good streak, just bored, you like the technicals but you don't know if you can trust them etc etc) - - and finally how you acted (or did not) act on the trade and what you would do differently if anything. Did you change the trade parameters in the middle and why? Did you pull out at the last second, or even 1 second into the trade? Did you not take profits where you said you would? Why why why...always ask why. You need to keep this journal for a few years.
Now you know why playing for keeps has absolutely nothing to do with paper trading. In fact, usually all paper trading does is generate false confidence and sets you up for failure emotionally.
The biggest enemy is almost always yourself. You can change your trading strategies and tactics (use paper trading for that) but you can't get outside of your own head. You need to mentally know yourself (I did not at your age) before you can truly trade for a living. And you cannot do that without taking risk. Risk reveals everything within you, and you will realize that you can't run from the inevitable.
You need to bring forward to your conscious the baggage that exists subconsciously,,, which can take some serious focus and honesty about who you really are as a person. Brutally honest things like fears of loss, fear of profit (oh yes, it exists) and all the baggage you inherited from your parents. It can go DEEP. Keep asking why for each feeling and action until you get to the bottom. The answer can sometimes be 30 "why's" until you arrive at a stupid ingrained piece of bullshit thrust upon you in your childhood. Or a defeatist attitude or insecurity or mental block your father used to repeat. yada yada. And it just fucked up your trade.
If you don't fight the enemy within you won't have a clear fact based mind and you wont 't be a trader. Wax on and wax off before getting into battle. Timeless themes never change.
Ideally you should feel no happier if your trade is a loser or a winner. Discipline means before every trade you enter with no regret of the outcome because you took your honest best shot for the 100% *right* reasons, and the chips fall where they may, and you can live with that.
Trading attracts a lot of lazy people and as you can probably see, long term success at this crazy game is anything but that. Discipline, mental honesty, and intellectual integrity vs "the easy way out". Its why the success rate is so goddamned low.