Thanks very much. I looked him up but can't tell where he is based. I might want to teach him something.
The Invisible Hand That Limits Your Trading
- Thread starter Rande Howell
- Start date
Thanks very much. I looked him up but can't tell where he is based. I might want to teach him something.
Quote from Optionpro007:
Red,
Here it goes. The year was 2005. I had just self-destroyed a relationship that was not good for me to begin with. That is the year when I realized something was wrong with me but I couldnââ¬â¢t tell what it was. I was having so much fun living life I had missed the fact that I had self-sabotaged everything I had achieved in my life. Everything I had gained, and I had gained a lot, I had given back and more in most if not all areas of my life.
Two years later, I discovered that what I had or still have, is referred to self-defeating personality disorder. In my case, this was and still is well hidden deep in my subconscious.
For those who are not familiar with the term, self-defeating personality disorder is something prevalent in all humans. It goes from extremes, from Adolf Hitler in self-destruction to Mother Theresa in self-sacrifice to Tiger Woods, to Charley Sheen etcââ¬Â¦.
As humans we all tend to have behaviors that go against our own best interest from time to time. This only becomes an issue if this affects your ability to live a wholesome life, as in my case.
Over the last four years I have tried everything there is to try to correct my behavior. NLP, EFT, Hypnosis, affirmations, visualizations, even industrial magnets!ââ¬Â¦Ã¢â¬Â¦I went to a psychologist, a psychiatrist, I tried medicine for anxiety, for mood disordersââ¬Â¦..etc..
This disorder is hereditary as I later was able to put all the pieces together.
I guess I could write a book on this, so to make it short these are my findings in short form and what I think my next step should be. Also note the fact that I am not trying to solve any of the consequences of my problem but the cause itself.
As I was learning about personality disorders, I learned that a person that has one personality disorder normally has symptoms of others, something called comorbidity).
This has led me to believe that the cause of this disorder and probably most disorders is something that is missing within the chemistry of the brain. A chemical, a hormone, an enzyme, something is missing, and this vacuum makes the brain give dysfunctional orders to our conscious and subconscious mind.
To give an example to those who don't have problems, it is as if you were born uncomfortable, so you canââ¬â¢t tell you are uncomfortable because you have never felt what it is to be comfortable.
During the next few months I will be trying to fix the problem looking at this from a purely chemical perspective. I was going to start a thread precisely on this subject asking for ideas.
The good news is that I have now a trading system that works and will be able to tell in a very short period of time if I have been able to correct the problem without fear of self-destruction.
Serious comments and ideas welcomed.
p.s. Hope Rearden is reading this as I would love to hear his thoughts on this.
p.s.s. please excuse my grammatical errors.
In all seriousness, let me encourage you not to fight it, but to roll with it. I am pretty fucked up myself, and long ago learned the truth of the NLP dictum "What can you do with a problem like that?" If you would like to discuss it, man to man, start a thread and I will do my best to help. I most sincerely believe in being true to yourself, no matter how painful that may be. Self-acceptance is the key. If you take the path I counsel, will you get better? Fuck, no! If you take the path that I counsel, will you care that you didn't get better? Fuck no!
Sorry, but I did not say that I behave while he is around and misbehave when he is not around. . Not sure how you got that idea. I did say that he recc. I stay away from ET. And yes, I break the rules at times.
To clarify, he is not, 'my psychologist'. He is my trading psychology coach who happens to be a psychologist and a trader. Nothing more, nothing less.
OP007
Couple of questionsâ¦.
Your self destructive behavior
Do you know youâre doing it â while youâre doing itâ¦.. or does it become evident/ obvious after the fact?
If you know youâre doing it â while youâre doing it⦠do you ever say to yourself â stopâ¦.
If you do tell yourself to stop â and you donât⦠why do you think you are not stoppingâ¦.
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OR
Does your self destructive behavior become evident/ obvious â after the fact?
And you find yourself suffering from âbuyerâs remorseâ
And possibly you are holding onto that âbuyerâs remorseâ
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Asking this to figure out how much is truly self destructive (it is conscious behavior) ⦠vs. how much is simply after the fact arm chair quarter backing on your part (hindsight it became evident you screwed up / made a bad decision â and youâre having trouble letting it go)
RN
???
I've been day trading LVS exclusive for the past 8 months (I periodically switch just to keep the IRS at bay)
AIG, RIMM, POT are the others on my list
Confused why you're sorry
If you're seeing a chink in what Iâm doing â please educate me (ainât married to any of it â itâs simply the way I evolved)
RN
If I gave offense it was unintentional. Had too much to drink. I simply meant that I was sorry that you lost that much money, or what is a lot of money to me. I typically lose no more than about $60 per contract, which is a LOT of booze. If I don't win, I don't drink. I am not qualified to comment on how you trade because I am not smart enough to trade the way you do. Tried it for a year or so and failed miserably. But I do heartly agree with trading the same instrument all the time. I haven't traded anything but NQ for maybe eight years, except for position trading themes. Last couple of years the theme was high dividends. This year it is energy and other resources. Have a great weekend!
Thanks for your reply. I really wish on the first idea and agree with you wholeheartedly on the second.
I am not a fan of prescription drugs either. I should have mentioned that I am not looking for a drug to make me feel higher or lower. At a conscious level I am perfectly balanced. I am going to focus on finding something that will make me feel comfortable, very subtle at a subconscious level.
I accept though that I I have no idea at this time if this drug exits.
I welcome suggestions if anybody has one.
Hi Red,
Please don't take this the wrong way, just know that it is difficult for someone who doesn't have an ailment to understand what it is to have one.
I remember many years ago how I was completely convinced that people who suffered from depression were wimps. I thought they just needed to see the bright side of life and be done with it. Obviously back then I didn't have much respect for them. Today is a different story.
If you met me in person you would never imagine that I have any problem whatsoever. To the contrary you would think that I have an incredible personality, which is true by the way...
My issue is all deep subconscious. Covert operations. I don't seem to be able to stop it, and I have given it my best so far.
I am going to beat this problem one way or another. I want get married, have a family and be wholesome, I have to do it.
Your brain is actually a powerful pharmacy. Emotional states and the embedded beliefs about self produce a unique cocktail that forms the basis of the biology of emotion -- and cognition.
Herbert Benson, the research cardiologist, studied Yogi's to discover how they were able to manage mind, thought, and stuff that Western science believed could not be managed by humans. At the bottom of it is breathing and relaxation as a skill. He discovered that an emotion like fear or anger could not be maintained when bellows breathing and relaxation was applied to the aroused emotional state. Mood management became possible.
However, a person's sense of meaning or sense of purpose is not changed by mere management of emotional state. This requires applied mindfulness. In mindfulness, you become witness to your thoughts and you discover you and your thoughts are not the same. This is powerful.
In applied mindfulness, the observer of thought becomes an explorer and inventer of the self. It requires pushing through the door of fear and finding empowering elements of the self that become available as you learn to master fear.
People who have a black and white way of understanding the world will miss this like ships in the night. Let them pass. The mind beyond the confines of self imposed blinders begins an extraordinary journey into what life can be.
Keep it up.
Rande Howell
Rande Howell