OK well I can make this pretty simple
Hermit, you need to feel as though you are doing something that moves you closer to your goal every day. The way you do this is to step back for a moment and make some carefully considered decisions about where you want to be x years from now. The rest is a matter of discipline. Anytime you have trouble getting to the "next step" or just feeling down, just remember that it can all be gone in an instant.
My dad was a career Navy Officer. He survived many things including Korea, Vietnam and others. One day when we least expected it, he was gone. What ever you really want in this life I suggest you "go for it" with everything you've got. Whatever you want to say, say it now. I can guarantee you that these are not just words to me. I hope they get through to you.
Good luck,
Steve