Jokes 2
- Thread starter gwb-trading
- Start date
And we complain about difficult pronunciations!
http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/55f04b8de4b002d5c077704d
http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/55f04b8de4b002d5c077704d
Dr. Geezer's Clinic
An old geezer became very bored in retirement and decided to open a medical clinic. He put a sign up outside that said: "Dr. Geezer's clinic. Get your treatment for $500, if not cured, get back $1,000."
Doctor "Young," who was positive that this old geezer didn't know beans about medicine, thought this would be a great opportunity to get $1,000. So he went to Dr.Geezer's clinic.
Dr. Young: "Dr.Geezer, I have lost all taste in my mouth. Can you please help me ??"
Dr. Geezer: "Nurse, please bring medicine from box 22 and put 3 drops in Dr. Young's mouth."
Dr. Young: Aaagh !! -- "This is Gasoline!"
Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! You've got your taste back.That will be $500."
Dr. Young gets annoyed and goes back after a couple of days figuring to recover his money.
Dr. Young: "I have lost my memory, I cannot remember anything."
Dr. Geezer: "Nurse, please bring medicine from box 22 and put 3 drops in the patient's mouth."
Dr. Young: "Oh, no you don't, -- that is Gasoline!"
Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! You've got your memory back. That will be $500."
Dr. Young (after having lost $1000) leaves angrily and comes back after several more days.
Dr. Young: "My eyesight has become weak --- I can hardly see anything!!!!
Dr. Geezer: "Well, I don't have any medicine for that so, " Here's your $1000 back." (giving him a $10 bill)
Dr. Young: "But this is only $10!
Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! You got your vision back! That will be $500."
An old geezer became very bored in retirement and decided to open a medical clinic. He put a sign up outside that said: "Dr. Geezer's clinic. Get your treatment for $500, if not cured, get back $1,000."
Doctor "Young," who was positive that this old geezer didn't know beans about medicine, thought this would be a great opportunity to get $1,000. So he went to Dr.Geezer's clinic.
Dr. Young: "Dr.Geezer, I have lost all taste in my mouth. Can you please help me ??"
Dr. Geezer: "Nurse, please bring medicine from box 22 and put 3 drops in Dr. Young's mouth."
Dr. Young: Aaagh !! -- "This is Gasoline!"
Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! You've got your taste back.That will be $500."
Dr. Young gets annoyed and goes back after a couple of days figuring to recover his money.
Dr. Young: "I have lost my memory, I cannot remember anything."
Dr. Geezer: "Nurse, please bring medicine from box 22 and put 3 drops in the patient's mouth."
Dr. Young: "Oh, no you don't, -- that is Gasoline!"
Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! You've got your memory back. That will be $500."
Dr. Young (after having lost $1000) leaves angrily and comes back after several more days.
Dr. Young: "My eyesight has become weak --- I can hardly see anything!!!!
Dr. Geezer: "Well, I don't have any medicine for that so, " Here's your $1000 back." (giving him a $10 bill)
Dr. Young: "But this is only $10!
Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! You got your vision back! That will be $500."
After having dug to a depth of 10 feet last year, Australian scientists found traces of copper wire dating back 200 years and came to the conclusion that their ancestors already had a telephone network more than 150 years ago.
Not to be outdone by the Aussies, in the weeks that followed, an American archaeologist dug to a depth of 20 feet and...
Shortly after, a story was published in the new York Times - "American archaeologists, finding traces of 250 year old copper wire, have concluded that their ancestors already had an advanced high-tech communications network 50 years earlier than the Australians.
One week late, the City council in Sheffield, reported the following - "After digging as deep as 30 feet in Darnal, Jack Lucknow, a self-taught archaeologist, reported that he found absolutely bugger all.
Jack has therefore concluded that 250 years ago, Britain had already gone wireless."
Not to be outdone by the Aussies, in the weeks that followed, an American archaeologist dug to a depth of 20 feet and...
Shortly after, a story was published in the new York Times - "American archaeologists, finding traces of 250 year old copper wire, have concluded that their ancestors already had an advanced high-tech communications network 50 years earlier than the Australians.
One week late, the City council in Sheffield, reported the following - "After digging as deep as 30 feet in Darnal, Jack Lucknow, a self-taught archaeologist, reported that he found absolutely bugger all.
Jack has therefore concluded that 250 years ago, Britain had already gone wireless."