Jokes 2

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Someone applied autotune to this guy's interview. Poor guy! The song is not too bad tho.

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I was a very inquisitive child and one day I asked my dad,

"Dad, can you get aids of a toilet seat?"

"Well you can if you sit down before the other fucker gets up" He replied.
 
I won''t make the same mistake this summer as I did on the dry, sunny day last year.

Mu wife asked me if I would go out for a walk in the park with her. I agreed, on condition she went without wearing her panties.

We were standing beside the lake, when I decided to step into a canoe near the bank.

I nearly fucking drowned because the 'canoe' turned out to be an upskirt reflection of her cunt.
 
Good one, nutmeg. It reminds me of Steve Martin's line, “I believe you should place a woman on a pedestal – high enough so you can look up her dress.”
 
Franco's Highly Polished Gucci Shoes

Franco, the Italian Stallion at the local night club, leaned

forward and said to the young lady he was dancing with, "I'd

like to compliment you on your panties. They are pink with

your initials embroidered, and trimmed in lace."

"How do you know?" inquired the young lady.

Franco replied, "I'm wearing my three hundred dollar Gucci

shoes that are highly polished, and I can see the reflection

up your skirt."

With that, the young lady slaps his face and hurries off the

dance floor.

A short time later, Franco begins dancing with another pretty

young lady, when he says, "I'd like to compliment you on your

panties. They are brown with tan trim and embroidered with

the day of the week."

"How do you know?" she demanded to know.

Franco replied, "I'm wearing my three hundred Gucci shoes.

They are highly polished and I can see the reflection of what

is up your skirt."

Again, Franco gets his face slapped, and the second young lady

storms off the dance floor.

Unaffected by his rejections, Franco begins dancing with yet

another pretty young lady. After a moment, he asks, "Are you

wearing black, furry panties?"

The pretty young lady replied, "I'm not wearing any panties

at all."

"Thank God," he blurted out, "because I thought I had a split

in my three hundred dollar Gucci shoes!"
 
Quote from trendo:

Good one, nutmeg. It reminds me of Steve Martin's line, “I believe you should place a woman on a pedestal – high enough so you can look up her dress.”
More...

:D That's so funny. never heard it before.
 
The Washington Wizards have just announced the addition of a new sponsor and the renaming of their arena.
The new name... the Ben Gay Arena.
 
Jason Collins has come to terms with the fact that his career may be over and he's thinking of pursuing his life long dream of being in the navy. He just loves being around seamen.
 
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