Jokes 2

[nutmeg]

"Bond..".

"James Bond?"

"No", replied Jamal. "Bail bond"

 

[nutmeg]

Some Chinese guy just called me, He said, "Is your Car for Sale?".

I said, "No sorry, Its for Driving, Maybe you should look on Boats.com".

 

[nutmeg]

(I need some help with this. Tell me if this is funny. I'm not sure.)

A short story.

"What's the matter with you?" I asked my Italian cousin.

"What's the matter with you?" he replied.

The end.

(Maybe it needs a third line... )

 

[nutmeg]

Quote from nutmeg:

(I need some help with this. Tell me if this is funny. I'm not sure.)

A short story.

"What's the matter with you?" I asked my Italian cousin.

"What's the matter with you?" he replied.

The end.

(Maybe it needs a third line... )

The arguement..by Nutmeg.

-------------------

"What's the matter with you?" I asked my Italian cousin.

"What's the matter with you?" he replied.

"What's the matter with you?"

"What's the matter with you?"

"What's the matter with you?"

"What's the matter with you?"

"Shuduppa"

"You shuduppa"

"Shuduppa your face"

"Shuduppa your face"

"What's the matter with you?"

"What's the matter with you?"

"What's the matter with you?"

"What's the matter with you?"

"Shuduppa"

"You shuduppa"

"Shuduppa your face"

"Shuduppa your face"

 

[Yannis]

Best Short Story

"The last man on Earth sat nervously at the edge of the bed. There was a knock on the door..."

 

[nutmeg]

Quote from Yannis:

Best Short Story

"There was a knock on the door..."

It was a dark and stormy night, suddenly there was a tap on the window. He thought, ""That's a strange place for a tap."

 

[Yannis]

...Through that window he saw a bunch of women giggling and playing taps -- and said to himself: "that can't be good!..."

 

[Yannis]

Speaking Of Canada

<iframe width="640" height="360" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/5JX4gWcWRAo?feature=player_detailpage" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

 

[fhl]

A US Border Patrol Agent catches an illegal alien in the bushes right by the border fence, he pulls him out and says “Sorry, you know the law, you’ve got to go back across the border right now.”

The Mexican man pleads with them, “No, noooo Senior, I must stay in de USA! Pleeeze!”

The Border Patrol Agent thinks to himself, I’m going to make it hard for him and says “Ok, I’ll let you stay if you can use 3 English words in a sentence” The Mexican man of course agrees. The Border Patrol Agent tells him, “The 3 words are: Green, Pink and Yellow. Now use them in a sentence.”

The Mexican man thinks really hard for about 2 minutes, then says, “Hmmm, Ok. The phone, it went Green, Green, Green, I Pink it up and sez Yellow?”

 

[fhl]

I like to be taken seriously when i spread a rumor on twitter so i always use the word 'confirmed'.