Jokes 2

For the last ten years of his life I always believed Dad was suffering from Alzheimers.


It was only at his funeral that I realised I'd been visiting the wrong house.
 
A pair of cows were talking in the field. One says, "Have you heard about the mad cow disease that's going around?"

"Yeah," the other cow says. "Makes me glad I'm a penguin."
 
You know you watched too much porn when...you showed your co-worker a picture of your dream vacation spot without realizing there is a topless woman posing with her legs spread wide open in the picture!

:eek:
 
I stayed in a hotel in Kentucky once and the sink had a problem in the bathroom.

So I called the front desk and told them "I gotta leak in my sink".

The guy said "go ahead".
 
Batman-Needs-a-Break.jpg
 
awesome:
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A very loud, unattractive, mean-acting woman walks into Wal-Mart with
>> her two kids in tow, screaming obscenities at them all the way through
>> the entrance.
>>
>> The Wal-Mart Greeter says, "Good morning and welcome to Wal-Mart. Nice
>> children you've got there - are they twins?"
>>
>> The ugly woman stops screaming long enough to say, "Hell no they ain't,
>> the oldest one, he's 9 and the younger one, she's 7.
>>
>> Why the hell would you think they're twins? Are you blind or just
>> stupid? Do you really think they look alike?"
>>
>> "No", replies the greeter. "I just couldn't believe you got laid twice."
 
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