Jokes 2
- Thread starter gwb-trading
- Start date
It sounds funny ... I hope it won't happen ... but those who track rumors say BO didn't actually say it ... even if he means it ...
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Once upon a time in a village, a man appeared and announced to the villagers that he would buy all monkeys for $10 each. The villagers seeing there were many monkeys around, went out into the forest, and started catching them.
The man bought thousands at $10 and as the supply started to diminish, the villagers stopped their effort. He then announced that he would now buy them at $20. This renewed the effort of the villagers and they started catching monkeys again.
Soon the supply diminished even further and the people started going back to their farms. The offer increased to $25 each and the supply of monkey became so little that it was an effort to even see a monkey, let alone catch one!
The man then announced that he had to go to the city on business and when he returned, he would buy monkeys for $50 each.
He left his assistant in charge and departed for the city.
In the absence of the man, the assistant told the villagers: 'Look at all these monkeys the man has collected and put in the big cage. I will sell them to you at $35 each and when the man returns from the city, you can sell them to him for $50 each.'
The villagers rounded up all their savings and bought all the monkeys.
They never saw the man or his assistant again, only monkeys everywhere!
Now you have a better understanding of how the stock market works!
The man bought thousands at $10 and as the supply started to diminish, the villagers stopped their effort. He then announced that he would now buy them at $20. This renewed the effort of the villagers and they started catching monkeys again.
Soon the supply diminished even further and the people started going back to their farms. The offer increased to $25 each and the supply of monkey became so little that it was an effort to even see a monkey, let alone catch one!
The man then announced that he had to go to the city on business and when he returned, he would buy monkeys for $50 each.
He left his assistant in charge and departed for the city.
In the absence of the man, the assistant told the villagers: 'Look at all these monkeys the man has collected and put in the big cage. I will sell them to you at $35 each and when the man returns from the city, you can sell them to him for $50 each.'
The villagers rounded up all their savings and bought all the monkeys.
They never saw the man or his assistant again, only monkeys everywhere!
Now you have a better understanding of how the stock market works!
I think it could be said more accurately like this:
Once upon a time in a stock market, a Goldman Sachs ANALyst appeared and announced to the traders that he would buy all solar stocks for $100 each. The traders seeing there were many solar stocks around, went out into the market, and started buying them.
The traders bought tens of millions of shares at $100 and as the supply started to diminish, the traders stopped their effort. The GS ANALyst then announced that he would now buy them at $200. This renewed the effort of the traders and they started buying solar stocks again.
Soon the supply diminished even further and the traders started going back to their trading stations. The offer increased to $250 each and the supply of solar stocks became so little that it was an effort to even see a solar stock, let alone catch one!
The GS ANALyst then announced that he had to go to the FED on business and when he returned, he would buy solar stocks for $500 each.
He left his assistant in charge and departed for the FED.
In the absence of the ANALyst, the assistant told the villagers: 'Look at all these solar stocks the traders have collected and put in the big money pool. I will sell them to you at $350 each and when the ANALyst returns from the FED, you can sell them to him for $500 each.'
The traders rounded up all their savings and bought all the solar stocks.
They never saw the ANALyst or his CEO again, only dumped solar stocks everywhere!
Now you have a better understanding of how the stock market works!
Once upon a time in a stock market, a Goldman Sachs ANALyst appeared and announced to the traders that he would buy all solar stocks for $100 each. The traders seeing there were many solar stocks around, went out into the market, and started buying them.
The traders bought tens of millions of shares at $100 and as the supply started to diminish, the traders stopped their effort. The GS ANALyst then announced that he would now buy them at $200. This renewed the effort of the traders and they started buying solar stocks again.
Soon the supply diminished even further and the traders started going back to their trading stations. The offer increased to $250 each and the supply of solar stocks became so little that it was an effort to even see a solar stock, let alone catch one!
The GS ANALyst then announced that he had to go to the FED on business and when he returned, he would buy solar stocks for $500 each.
He left his assistant in charge and departed for the FED.
In the absence of the ANALyst, the assistant told the villagers: 'Look at all these solar stocks the traders have collected and put in the big money pool. I will sell them to you at $350 each and when the ANALyst returns from the FED, you can sell them to him for $500 each.'
The traders rounded up all their savings and bought all the solar stocks.
They never saw the ANALyst or his CEO again, only dumped solar stocks everywhere!
Now you have a better understanding of how the stock market works!
Who's On First?
A medical doctor, an architect and a politician were arguing whose profession was the oldest.
The doctor said that since the human race was created by God, medicine should be considered as the oldest because it was being exercised at the very beginning of our collective life on the planet.
The architect countered that before creating man, God had created the whole universe, which was a clear expression of architecture - and therefore it should be considered the first profession.
The politician listened carefully and then joined the discussion with a few pointed questions:
"OK, OK, God created the universe... but what was there before?"
"It was just chaos" the other two replied.
"And who created that? !!!"
A medical doctor, an architect and a politician were arguing whose profession was the oldest.
The doctor said that since the human race was created by God, medicine should be considered as the oldest because it was being exercised at the very beginning of our collective life on the planet.
The architect countered that before creating man, God had created the whole universe, which was a clear expression of architecture - and therefore it should be considered the first profession.
The politician listened carefully and then joined the discussion with a few pointed questions:
"OK, OK, God created the universe... but what was there before?"
"It was just chaos" the other two replied.
"And who created that? !!!"