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Jokes 2
- Thread starter gwb-trading
- Start date
Me, I like a man with one leg. You like that look? I like that look. The way he walks up to you, like if he always has something important to say.
"it's kind of slippery out there."
-"Thank-you one legged man!"
"the elevator's broken"
-"Thank-you one legged man!"
That guys helping everybody out. he's got information.
"Thank-you one legged man"
"Oh, it's alright"
"it's kind of slippery out there."
-"Thank-you one legged man!"
"the elevator's broken"
-"Thank-you one legged man!"
That guys helping everybody out. he's got information.
"Thank-you one legged man"
"Oh, it's alright"
There once was a man who had a son. This was no ordinary son though, he was only a head.
On the heads 21st birthday his father took him to a bar to get his first drink. Well they get into the bar and heads father orders a beer for the both of them. As head finished his drink something strange began to happen, he started to grow a chest.
Seeing this his father quickly ordered another drink for his son . No sooner than he finished that drink he grew two arms. At this time people in the bar began to notice what was happening,and the bartender in shock from this put up a round on the house for the young man.
And just like before as soon as he drank the beer he grew legs thus turning him into a complete person.
The boys father by now was estatic and quickly ordered a shot of whiskey for his son. The boy drank and "POOF" he disappeared.
Everybody was in shock of what had just happened, and the boys father fell to his knees crying o'lord what have I done.
I was there, I saw the whole thing happen. I told him, he should have quit while he was a head, but no,nobody listens to Nutmeg.
On the heads 21st birthday his father took him to a bar to get his first drink. Well they get into the bar and heads father orders a beer for the both of them. As head finished his drink something strange began to happen, he started to grow a chest.
Seeing this his father quickly ordered another drink for his son . No sooner than he finished that drink he grew two arms. At this time people in the bar began to notice what was happening,and the bartender in shock from this put up a round on the house for the young man.
And just like before as soon as he drank the beer he grew legs thus turning him into a complete person.
The boys father by now was estatic and quickly ordered a shot of whiskey for his son. The boy drank and "POOF" he disappeared.
Everybody was in shock of what had just happened, and the boys father fell to his knees crying o'lord what have I done.
I was there, I saw the whole thing happen. I told him, he should have quit while he was a head, but no,nobody listens to Nutmeg.
Once upon a time there were three little bunny rabbits, Foot, Foot-Foot and Foot-Foot-Foot, and they were outside playing. All of a sudden, Foot grabs his head and says, "I'm really sick, I think I'm gonna die."
So, Foot-Foot and Foot-Foot-Foot run into the house and say, "Mama come quick, Foot's sick and we think he's gonna die."
She says, "Foot-Foot and Foot-Foot-Foot you go and get the doctor."
So they go to the doctor and say, Doctor, doctor, come quick. Foot's sick and we think he's gonna die."
Doctor says, "I'll be there as soon as I can."
Well, the doctor wasn't in time and Foot died, so they buried him. And Foot-Foot and Foot-Foot-Foot just sat around the house and moped. Finally, Mama said, "Foot-Foot and Foot-Foot-Foot you go outside and play. Foot's dead and that's all there is to it."
Well, while they're outside playing, all of a sudden, Foot-Foot grabs his head and says, "Foot-Foot-Foot I'm sick just like Foot was and I think I'm gonna die."
So Foot-Foot-Foot runs into the house and says, "Mama come quick. Foot-Foot's sick just like Foot was and I think he's gonna die."
She said, "Well, Foot-Foot-Foot, you run and go get the doctor."
So Foot-Foot-Foot run and got the doctor and said, "Doctor, doctor, come quick. Foot-Foot's sick just like Foot was and we think he's gonna die."
And the doctor says, "Well, I'll be there as soon as I can."
And Foot-Foot-Foot says, "Well, you better be quicker than you were last time because we've already got one Foot in the grave."
So, Foot-Foot and Foot-Foot-Foot run into the house and say, "Mama come quick, Foot's sick and we think he's gonna die."
She says, "Foot-Foot and Foot-Foot-Foot you go and get the doctor."
So they go to the doctor and say, Doctor, doctor, come quick. Foot's sick and we think he's gonna die."
Doctor says, "I'll be there as soon as I can."
Well, the doctor wasn't in time and Foot died, so they buried him. And Foot-Foot and Foot-Foot-Foot just sat around the house and moped. Finally, Mama said, "Foot-Foot and Foot-Foot-Foot you go outside and play. Foot's dead and that's all there is to it."
Well, while they're outside playing, all of a sudden, Foot-Foot grabs his head and says, "Foot-Foot-Foot I'm sick just like Foot was and I think I'm gonna die."
So Foot-Foot-Foot runs into the house and says, "Mama come quick. Foot-Foot's sick just like Foot was and I think he's gonna die."
She said, "Well, Foot-Foot-Foot, you run and go get the doctor."
So Foot-Foot-Foot run and got the doctor and said, "Doctor, doctor, come quick. Foot-Foot's sick just like Foot was and we think he's gonna die."
And the doctor says, "Well, I'll be there as soon as I can."
And Foot-Foot-Foot says, "Well, you better be quicker than you were last time because we've already got one Foot in the grave."
Nutmeg, the "rabbit" foot joke would be a good joke to tell kids. They won't understand the punchline, but if you laugh real hard at the end, they will laugh too.
If they don't laugh, say "allright, I tell it again" Then tell the joke again and when you get to the end, wait for the laughter, if none ensues, yell out "let's go get some ice cream" Everyone will be happy and cheering and excited and think Dad's jokes are really great cause they end in ice cream.
While everyone is laughing now and in a good mood, the time is ripe to ask.
"Who wants to be president of Daddy's fan club?"
They'll all be screaming "Me, me, me"
If they don't laugh, say "allright, I tell it again" Then tell the joke again and when you get to the end, wait for the laughter, if none ensues, yell out "let's go get some ice cream" Everyone will be happy and cheering and excited and think Dad's jokes are really great cause they end in ice cream.
While everyone is laughing now and in a good mood, the time is ripe to ask.
"Who wants to be president of Daddy's fan club?"
They'll all be screaming "Me, me, me"
....And Foot-Foot-Foot says, "Well, you better be quicker than you were last time because we've already got one Foot in the grave."
Geez, saw it coming, still had to laugh, stop it Nutmeg, LOL.
Don
Geez, saw it coming, still had to laugh, stop it Nutmeg, LOL.
Don