Jokes 2

How many prostitutes does it take to screw in a light bulb?

I have no idea Either.

I did hire four prostitutes once, but we did other stuff.
 
lol ^

Prostate check-up...


An old guy goes to his doctor for his physical and gets sent to the urologist as a precaution. When he gets there, he discovers the urologist is a very pretty female doctor.

The female doctor says, “I’m going to check your prostate today, but this new procedure is a little
different from what you are probably used to. I want you to lie on your right side, bend your knees, then while I check your prostate, take a deep breath and say, ‘99’.”


The old guy obeys and says, “99.”

The doctor says, “Great. Now turn over on your left side and again, while I repeat the check, take a deep breath and say, ‘99’.”

Again, the old guy says, “99.”

The doctor says, “Very good. Now then, I want you to lie on your back with your knees raised slightly. I’m going to check your prostate with this hand and with the other hand, I’m going to hold on to your penis to keep it out of the way. Now take a deep breath and say, ‘99’.”

The old guy begins, “One … Two …Three.”
 
Where Is Tim Geithner Headed Next?

Goldman Sachs

JP Morgan

Tax Consultancy

McDonalds

Ive League Professor

Any non-profit that will have him

Solitary Confinement
 
"According to the two law enforcement officials, the woman had a phone conversation with an incarcerated man within a day of her encounter with Mr. Strauss Kahn in which she discussed the possible benefits of pursuing the charges against him. The conversation was recorded."

Reminds me of the guy in prison who called his girlfriend and said "I think the phone is tapped so make sure you hide the "g-u-n" on the porch."
 
The LAPD, The FBI, and the CIA are all trying to prove that they are the best at apprehending criminals. The President decides to give them a test. He releases a rabbit into a forest and has each of them try to catch it.

The CIA goes in. They place animal informants throughout the forest. They question all plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investigations they conclude that rabbits do not exist.

The FBI goes in. After two weeks with no leads they burn the forest, killing everything in it, including the rabbit, and they make no apologies. The rabbit had it coming.

The LAPD goes in. They come out two hours later with a badly beaten raccoon. The raccoon is yelling: "Okay! Okay! I'm a rabbit! I'm a rabbit!"

The Prez hears about this, sacks the lot of them and orders a drone to overfly the area




:)
 
Gutsy Trick Play

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:) :) :)
 
What It Felt Like When I Started Daytrading Futures

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:) :) :)
 
Quote from Yannis:

Outstanding

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:cool:
More...

Dude, that was amazing. Kudos.
 
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