Chuck Norris Trading Facts

Quote from Optionspoet:

The FED is not concerned with inflation when it cuts rates.

The FED is concerned with the fact that Chuck Norris has a HELOC that is based on the fed funds rate.
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Hahahaha, WINNER!!!
 
Chuck Norris went on a shopping spree last weekend and charged $350M on his Mastercard.

Hence, Mastercard will report a charge off of $350M in next quarter's earnings release.

NOBODY asks Chuck Norris for payment.
 
Chuck Norris doesn't have to put in orders to make a profit, he stares at his P&L until it shows up out of fear.



Chuck Norris doesn't have a P&L statement. Chuck Norris never has a loss.
 
Chuck Norris is not concerned with overnight risk. He simply gives the evil eye to the markets before going to sleep.

Oh and Chuck Norris doesn't sleep. He lays quietly hoping that the markets deceive him so he can have an excuse to obliterate the financial world as we know it.

And His pillow is His gun.

I capitalize "His" out of respect.
 
Quote from Optionspoet:

Chuck Norris doesn't speculate when he trades hundreds of contracts on hogs, wheat, corn, OJ, coffee, etc.

This is how he goes grocery shopping.
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Pirceless!! :D :D :D
 
There was no earthquake in China.

Chuck Norris was trading the HSI and pounded his fist on the table because the index did not follow his instructions exactly.

He directed the force to the epicenter of China. He was trading from Antarctica at the time. He was there to cool off from his battle in HELL...

The devil double crossed him. He took the devils soul.
 
Chuck Norris accidentally rolled out of bed on Monday night....the result was a 7.8 magnitude earthquake in China. No one messes with Chuck, not even bears!
 
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