Chuck Norris Trading Facts

[Compulsive]

Go Chuck!

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[Optionspoet]

The last time your platform went down, it was not due to a technical issue.

Chuck Norris was seen on the company parking lot and everyone scrammed...even the automated machines took off...

Chuck Norris only visits you for one reason......to kill you

 

[Optionspoet]

options are a zero-sum game. Except for Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris ALWAYS wins.

 

[Optionspoet]

The average person is assigned for all short options expiring within .05 ITM by market close on expiration day.


Chuck Norris goes through the same process. Except it only applies to options over $50 ITM. Expiration day does not apply to him.

Chuck Norris NEVER gets assigned.

 

[Optionspoet]

The world is not going through a food crisis because of speculation.

Chuck Norris simply had a larger breakfast than usual.

 

[Optionspoet]

I can do this all day...

Am I the only one here?

C'mon...where the hell is Nutmeg, Fly, and Yannis?

 

[SCI new york]

Chuck Norris determines the Bid/Ask when he trades

 

[The Swordsman]

One time Chuck Norris took a loss on a trade so he round house kicked it....a loss has never showed up again.

 

[bobghazi]

I know this one isn't stock related, but its my favorite:

Chuck Norris' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd; no one fools Chuck Norris

 

[olias]

When your platform goes down, it's because Chuck Norris punched it in the face.