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Nothing says it more than that idiot picture of a rocket which OptionGuru posted. He had to spend time searching for and posting that little gem. If he had spent a little more time researching his trades and a little less time cavorting like a two year old maybe he wouldn't make such ill...

So that appears to be it for today. TSLA was down 9.76 on regular trading, up 11.74 after hours and is now at 234.30 TSLA filed a loss (as everyone knew they would): http://finance.yahoo.com/news/tesla-reports-1q-loss-203941490.html But not as much as some predicted...

Here's a real short term earnings trade that's in sync with valuations and market expectations: with TSLA at 232.32 Buy 1 TSLA MayWk1 235 Put Sell -1 TSLA MayWk1 225 Put Net debit = $485 Price..... Profit / Loss..... ROI % 168.75........ 515.00......... 106.19% 192.74........ 515.00...

I have explained the Probability calculation so many times I simply cannot do it again. (BTW: it is not "probability of success") Read some books.

UBS says TSLA will disappoint: http://www.marketwatch.com/story/teslas-quarterly-results-likely-a-big-miss-ubs-says-2016-05-03?siteid=yhoof2 What is the market expecting: http://www.marketwatch.com/story/what-to-expect-from-teslas-earnings-2016-05-02?siteid=yhoof2#:Fom4Oa5eFkFuUA...

The argument over investing vs gambling is a perennial one which eventually occurs, in one form or another, on all threads given enough time. In the hope of quenching a pointless discussion I offer this well thought out essay...

Then by all means you shouldn't do it. I myself prefer BINGO. I23...B16...G22...BINGO!!!! RATS :-)

Here's my short term trade: With TSLA at 241.80 June 300/305 bear call spread for a net credit of $25 Yield = 25/475 = 5.26% in 46 days or 42% annualized Prob = 89% Expectation = .89(25) - .09(475) - .02(238) = 22.25 - 42.75 - 4.76 = -25 Price........... Profit / Loss........ ROM %...

http://finance.yahoo.com/echarts?s=TSLA+Interactive#{"range":"2y","allowChartStacking":true} OptionsXpress says you can get that call for $.97 Price........... Profit / Loss....... ROI % 181.35............. (97.00)........ -100.00% 212.52............. (97.00)........ -100.00%...

http://www.thestreet.com/story/13552853/1/j-c-penney-jcp-stock-rallies-on-expectation-shares-could-double-over-three-years.html?puc=yahoo&cm_ven=YAHOO http://finance.yahoo.com/news/j-c-penney-shares-could-195143348.html...

"In what was expected to be a tough quarter for Apple (AAPL), fiscal-second-quarter results for the company came in below consensus on both the top and bottom lines. Revenues of $50.55 billion missed analysts' $51.97 billion consensus, while the $1.90 in earnings per share that Apple reported...

http://finance.yahoo.com/news/bear-day-goldman-sachs-gs-144302105.html http://finance.yahoo.com/q/ks?s=gs&ql=1 http://www.msn.com/en-us/money/stockdetails/financials/fi-126.1.GS.NYS http://stockcharts.com/h-sc/ui?s=gs Trade: With GS at 167.97 Oct 200/205 bear call spread for a net credit of...

http://finance.yahoo.com/news/irobot-irbt-q1-earnings-top-153903072.html http://finance.yahoo.com/q/ks?s=IRBT+Key+Statistics http://www.msn.com/en-us/money/stockdetails/financials/fi-126.1.IRBT.NAS http://finance.yahoo.com/echarts?s=IRBT+Interactive#{"range":"2y","allowChartStacking":true}...

http://finance.yahoo.com/news/post-maker-3ms-profit-beats-120635342.html http://finance.yahoo.com/news/3m-mmm-beats-q1-earnings-125212234.html http://www.msn.com/en-us/money/stockdetails/financials/fi-126.1.MMM.NYS...

http://finance.yahoo.com/news/labcorp-lh-tops-q1-earnings-140202812.html http://www.msn.com/en-us/money/stockdetails/financials/fi-126.1.LH.NYS http://finance.yahoo.com/echarts?s=LH+Interactive#{"range":"2y","allowChartStacking":true} Trade: With LH at 123.80 Nov 100/95 bull put spread for a...

http://finance.yahoo.com/news/ge-matches-q1-earnings-estimate-120512810.html http://www.usatoday.com/story/money/2016/04/22/general-electric-first-quarter-2016-earnings/83376658/ http://www.msn.com/en-us/money/stockdetails/financials/fi-126.1.GE.NYS...

http://finance.yahoo.com/echarts?s=MSFT+Interactive#{"range":"2y","allowChartStacking":true} http://stockcharts.com/h-sc/ui?s=msft Trade: With MSFT at 51.73 Oct 42/37 bull put spread for a net credit of $40 Yield = 40/460 = 8,65% in 176 days or 18% annualized Prob = NA Price...

Well, as I explained before, you have to leave IBM out of that list. As for Iron Condors I do like them sometimes, but you not only double your credit you also double the probability of exceeding the spread on one side which will not be completely compensated on the other side. I only do Iron...

A post from what's-his-name reminds me to add that I probably will not trade this in my account since I don't trade IBM as a rule.

Well...I'm having a few disasters lately. http://seekingalpha.com/news/3174240-alere-7-percent-abbott-chiefs-non-committal-comments-earnings-call First the Pfizer: Allergan merger was called off when the Treasury imposed new rules to discourage inversions, now we have a panic that Abbott might...