Quote from drcha:
Well here goes.. you may go ahead and shoot me if you like.....I might sound like some kook living in a hut in Montana.
There is a pervasive sense of entitlement in this country. Yes, there are a few savers here and there, but the more prevalent attitute is: I'm entitled to my job, entitled to own a fancy car, entitled to all the stuff I see on TV, entitled to own a 5000-sf house, etc.... and now I guess we are all entitled to get bailed out of whatever. So those who chose to buy only what they can clearly see the way to pay for, will pay for those who were profligate.
Where does it stem from? One poster commented on our status as a nation of migrants, thus risk-takers. There may be some truth to this.
Mostly, though, I think we believe that we are entitled to everything because we are taught that pattern of thinking from an early age. Childrearing has been child-indulging for the last fifty years or so. People are no longer taught to work hard, save, or any of that stuff, which is now considered very old-fashioned and foolish.
People I know tell me that they have to buy their kids everything because the kid's friends all have these things. What they are teaching their kids, subtly, is that it's important to keep up with the Jones, and that what other people think about your economic status is important. Do we really want to teach them that?
Furthermore, childrearing is done in a vacuum. Unlike Europe, we live hundreds or thousand of miles from our relatives, so there is no extended family to influence the raising of children or to shape their attitudes. The children are all so busy playing with their expensive computer toy-thing-ies in their 5000 sf homes that they don't interact with the world enough to get a view of how others live differently. The only adult models that kids have are their parents and possibly a teacher or coach; there are no mitigating opinions or influences from other relatives or the rest of society. Of course, there are plenty of criminals and narcissists on TV for them to watch.
My guess is that this indulgence stems from both parents working. I don't suggest we go back to the 50's, but maybe there is some way for people to at least stop throwing things at their kids in lieu of spending time with them. My observation has been that I see a profound difference in these attitudes between people who are my age (52) and younger, as opposed to the generation before me. My older friends just don't seem to believe that the world owes them anything.
I think my parents, who made their share of mistakes, got this absolutely right. When I was young I used to wish I had a dollar for every damn time they said to me, "We're not going to buy that. If you want it you will have to save your allowance, get a job, etc..." So now, I DO have a dollar for every time they said that to me. Strangely, it turns out that, while I could buy a hot car and all the crap I see on TV, most of it's just not that interesting to me. Go figure.