Quote from Big Money:
OTCkrak,
Frankly, IMHO this letter needs major revamping. In the first paragraph, sending your resume, thinking and then saying this qualifies as full commitment is a bit disingenuous right off the bat. It should go without saying that you are committed to the job or you wouldnât have applied so there is no need to say it again. Sounds like you are trying too hard to me or just trying to say what you think I want to hear (just my opinion only).
Salary requirements are an easy way to filter resumes quickly and easily on both the high and the low side so you may want to get used to it. This is especially true these days as they have the pick of the litter with so many unemployed or underemployed. But your sentence âI would hope that my candidacy not be dismissed on the basis of this salary requirementâ I wouldnât hire you for that sentence right there for two reasons. First, who are you to tell me (as the employer) what my basis for making a hiring decision is going to be? Who are you and do I care (is what they are thinking)?. Second, this sentence also says you believe you can exclude yourself from this requirement by putting in a comment about it. This would make would be employers also wonder what other rules or regulations or policies you also may decide donât apply to you. Hence, they wonât take the chance on you.
The second paragraph should be deleted entirely as it just goes from bad to worse after the first sentence referenced above. Referring to any group of people, even if it is true, labels you very poorly as well. You canât alienate someone you know nothing about as they may have been in the group you are insulting or have a family member in that group and thus you are also automatically disqualified. If you have to insult people to try to get a job, how will you treat coworkers or customers over disagreements? I hope you didnât actually send this to an employer as a college grad because you should know better than this IMHO.
A word of advice: Do not mention any comment about them requiring salary requirements, donât insult any group and just state your case and move on. It works both ways too. Maybe they want to pay way less than you would consider taking for a salary. If that is the case, you save your time and money by not having to interview with a company that wouldnât pay near what you require and you could focus on finding better fitting jobs for both of you.
Accepted not excepted on page 2. You got it right in your Cover letter though. If you made a bad error on your resume or in a letter you had to write describing yourself, you probably would also be automatically disqualified. The whole letter says donât hire me IMHO. I have a chip on my shoulder and am disrespectful to anyone I disagree with. Just some things to think about or consider.
Best of luck
BM