Wayne it's funny I got this rejection letter in the mail from a publisher regarding my sci fi work NeuroJack (tm)
Dear Mr Stoney,
I am afraid your manuscript contains excessive profanity and vulgar language and as such had to be given to our red light dept. It is
insulting and somehow argumentitive with yourself, yet has no scientific merit. Furthermore descriptions of such activities as you describe are unlawful, threatening and abusive of your great word power. I find your constant follow up letters harassing, defamatory, libelous, deceptive, fraudulent an invasive yet I like your work very much.Perhaps at our junkier imprint The Penguin's Butt Hole Books we can work a deal for a more tortious concept- think Meat Cleaver 7 and that can contain explicit or graphic descriptions or accounts of sexual acts as well as a torture rack.
In general we do not like to victimize, harass, degrade, or intimidates an individual or group of individuals on the basis of religion, gender, sexual orientation, race, ethnicity, age, or disability... but you do it so well we must find a way. Can you meet with us soon about this urgent matter?
As long as your new manuscript does not
infringe on any patent, trademark, trade secret, copyright, right of publicity, or other proprietary right of any party... or they have been dead for 70 years and as long as your " everyone mail the author $1 rebate program " does not
constitute an unauthorized or unsolicited advertising, or any other form of unauthorized solicitation. As long as you no longer gamble, or type on a computer that contains software viruses or any other computer code, files, or programs that are designed or intended to disrupt, damage, or limit the functioning of any software, hardware, or telecommunications equipment or to damage or obtain unauthorized access to any data or other information of any third party; or impersonates any person or entity, including any employee of Starbucks.
We would love to have you bother us with another manuscript someday.
Frick&FrackPublishing NYC......