Quote from nazzdack:
Jake, thanks for the sell-signal.
That made me laugh out loud. Thanks.
I have to share a story...sorry.
I was at Merrill Lynch (1999) and I don't know if somebody gave these guys my number or the phones were just getting so flooded with these calls that they were getting through to me. Anyway, I'll never forget these two calls I received in the same week:
The first one was a guy, about 19 I guess, and called and said he wanted to buy shares of Yahoo. I asked him why and he said because he wanted to buy a new car and if he bought Yahoo then in a few months he would be able to get his car. I told him if he really wanted to buy Yahoo, call Schwaab and buy it. He then said that he had no money and he asked if he could just put it on his credit card.
The second one was also a young guy, definitely in his teens. He said that he saved up a couple of thousand dollars and he wanted to start investing. I told him that I really didn't do that and with $2,000 he should call Schwaab (yes, I always referred them to Schwaab -- we were e-Trade haters at ML). But in this case, I took a lot of time with him explaining that it wasn't so easy, yada, yada. He actually got pissed off and assured me he knew what was going on. I asked him what he did for a living that made him so confident in his investment prowess, and -- I swear to GOD -- he said, "Well, I deliver pizzas." I am not making this up. He then explained that he had a mentor that was teaching him everything. I told him that it didn't matter, and he got more upset. He told me that he has been following everything the guy has been saying, and if he listened he would have been doing well already. I asked him what the other guy did for a living that made him a stock guru and mentor. And he said, "He delivers pizzas with me." I couldn't help myself. I put him on speaker phone and called others in to the office. I then had him repeat himself. You have to understand, this guy was pissed that I wouldn't invest his money. He was talking to me like I was a punk and he was a stock genius. I asked him who drove the pizza car, him or his buddy. It was his buddy, he said, because he didn't have his license yet. He then asked my name and then said he would sue me and Merrill Lynch if his picks went up and I refused his orders. After that I just hung up. We all looked at each other and said, "Holy Shit, either this market is going to crash and burn, or we better learn how to drive a pizza truck."