I am an extremely talented trader. Every day that passes, I usually have a position on that would make anywhere from $500-1k on the measly 1 lot I'm trading. I have 7 years of trading experience, and a couple years full time in terms of hours spent. I have had "success" day trading...
However, I have severe trading psychosis that started around 10 months ago with a couple heavy losing days. Back then, I was very ignorant and was a much more rigid trader. I can look back know and see something very obvious I needed to do, and these days it almost seems too easy for me to find great trades.
Code:
psy·cho·sis
[sīˈkōsəs]
NOUN
[*]a severe mental disorder in which thought and emotions are so impaired that contact is lost with external reality.
I have tried everything; meditation, studying charts, CBT, talking with others, on top of the tons of practice. But I think I have some deep rooted psychological issues that probably go back to me having to work hard for everything as a child, or my parents being very strict on spending or allowance, or things of that nature. It in part has to do with the fear of losing obviously. I'm extremely afraid of losing what I have, even though I know there is a paradox, you have to lose sometimes to win, and you need to give yourself room (drawdown a lil) or you'll cancel all the good trades you take (me). I also want this very bad for myself, as I have been mentally tortured for the last 7 years of my life and need to prove to myself that I am successful, and that I am more "successful" than everyone who told me I was a failure in the past, on top of never working for someone that can tell me I'm in some way inadequate.
I could post at least 10 charts that look like this one in the last 4 weeks. I totaled up the trades last week that I took. If I had held them like an hour or so I would have made anywhere from 3-4k on the 1 lots I had.
Despite knowing what is right, I am unable to do it right now. What is stopping me?
Not sure what "trading psychosis" is and can find no such term on the internet except this thread. However, normally psychotic people are unable to communicate understandably with other people, and are seen as speaking and acting incoherently. So I highly doubt your long post is from a psychotic mind, which is a severe condition that should be treated by competent doctors to prevent worsening.
What you're experiencing sounds more like a mental or emotional trauma, which I think most traders can relate to, especially those having tried daytrading. It's
hard: not doing anything, waiting, for an entry, for an exit, for anything and knowing nothing. Which is why we build trading systems, because the emotional drain is not worth it. Very few people can take it and thrive. This trauma is usually easy to cure: Go away, do something else, go in nature, exercise, use your body. In time, it'll pass.
I am an extremely talented trader. Every day that passes, I usually have a position on that would make anywhere from $500-1k on the measly 1 lot I'm trading.
REALLY? On a 1 lot? Are you consistently making this, or is this "would make"
if only, aka wishful thinking. If you don't make enough money, then whatever talent you've got isn't giving you the results you work for. Time to rethink and replan, rather than keep patting yourself on your back and feeding your traumas.
You see, the reasons why you exit for a small gain or loss is very rational: You simply don't know wether the next trade will be a win or loss, keep gaining or turn red on a dime. Every minute, second and tick could change everything, so it's actually irrational to hold & pray, because over time the odds will be stacked against your one trade the closer your stops are. So as other here also suggested, you may need to deleverage and have stops further out, put on smaller positions and build on success, not failure. Even break-even is a phenomenal success compared to consistently losing, and can be built on. This is impossible if you think you're already an accomplished trader. Honesty will help you see what you need to improve. You see, what you or others call yourself doesn't really matter.
Btw, what are those dots in your diagram? They seem to be very close to price action, and if used as stops, no wonder you get stopped out too early regularly!
