Trading and Dating/social status

Now the good news. Chicks dig risk and love risk taking guys but this is only within the framework of security. In other words, for example, I own a marketing company and trade on the side for $ to buy luxury items cas, vacations, watches, whatever is much more appealing than I trade only. Not to mention the one dimensionality of just trading... Ladies
May think this makes you boring?
 
Quote from Dalmation:

Women want security. Traders don't provide security and live on the edge if their full time job ( outside of employed traders). Speaking of self employed traders only. Self employment is risky enough add in the extreme added risk of the market and it's not a good picture for ladies.

Show me I am wrong traders. Who is full time, no other income, self employed trader with hot, smart wife? I betcha you don't exist.
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my wife is a doctor and when we started dating she thought she'd be the bread winner- she almost choked when i told her i make more in a month than she will in a year (after about 9 months dating)
 
Like another post mentioned. There is an unfair stigma for traders that trade thier own money.

Even a guy who says he owns a pizza joint and a nightclub will have more percieved security than a trader who has been successful for 5 years plus. When in reality, restaurants and nightclubs fail more than any other position/business.

I think it comes down to the almighty bottomline. If you are making money, doing well. You pick her up in a 60k BMW, have a home that is yours, have money in the bank. Beleive me, she will think your profession is damn great.

Its about results. Great results can and will change all girls mind. Ed Seykota traded out his barn for 10years, do you think his wife had a "security" issues.

Those old stigmas about working from home are stupid. I know two guys that work from home that have million-dollar business. They have been doing it for years and dont give two shits what anyone thinks. At the end of the day, they hop in thier 50k pickups and are fishing by 530pm, when most people are bullshitting around the water cooler.

And if you are with a woman that cares that much about money, you need to put her in check anyways. Correct her ass or get a different one.

By the way this last sentence above will not be approved by the N.O.W.,, hahahah,, sorry No Doji.

EF
 
Reading the post, the thing you need is real confidence. You need that for trading and you need that for life. You should be proud of your profession. It's your life: be proud of it.

I give only the bare details of what I do because unless I'm friends with the person it's none of their business. If people ever get snide with you about your work, blow them off or give it back to them. Life is too short and there are too many people in the world to really care what another person thinks.

As to women, if you're dating for sex it doesn't matter what she thinks. If you're dating for love/marriage, then it really is a litmus test about how she feels about your career. A partner should be in your corner, period. If she doesn't consider what you do a real job, pump and dump her. Someone said above that the gal wanted to see his records. If any gal said that to me, it's immediately over. A woman is only as good as her fidelity. If she's not loyal, she's more worthless than our dollar.

Eddiefl:

"Its about results. Great results can and will change all girls mind" Totally credited. He's got a lot of good points in his post.
 
Quote from Maverick74:

I hate to break the bad news to you, but traders are regarded almost as low as fast food workers. What will impress a person more is "where" you trade. If you say you trade the e-mini at home they will think degenerate gambler in boxer shorts who surfs porn all day. You tell them you trade for Goldman or Citadel, they will respect you.

Look, 90% of traders make less then a fast food worker and the public knows this. Girls know this because if you live in NY or Chicago chances are the girl you are dating or want to date has dated several traders. She knows all too well about their financial status. Like I said, the only thing that can save you is working for a respectable firm.

BTW, this is why a lot of traders try to get on TV or into financial journalism, to raise their status a few ticks. Some go into politics, some will buy a bar. If you are trading from home, forget it. Just don't even bother bringing it up to people.
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Some of this can be mitigated, even in NYC or Chicago, if you went to the right schools, e.g. Harvard, MIT, UChicago, Wharton or about half-a-dozen other places. Then people will just assume that you're too smart to waste your time trading for a "good firm". Of course, your results then need to bear that out.
 
Quote from dumb_mother:

my wife is a doctor and when we started dating she thought she'd be the bread winner- she almost choked when i told her i make more in a month than she will in a year (after about 9 months dating)
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Nice! But you can Also lose more in a month than she makes in a year
 
Quote from Dalmation:

Nice! But you can Also lose more in a month than she makes in a year
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And she could make a mistake, lose her medical license and get sued for every dollar she's worth.

No shortage of risks in the world.
 
Quote from Dalmation:

Women want security. Traders don't provide security and live on the edge if their full time job ( outside of employed traders). Speaking of self employed traders only. Self employment is risky enough add in the extreme added risk of the market and it's not a good picture for ladies.

Show me I am wrong traders. Who is full time, no other income, self employed trader with hot, smart wife? I betcha you don't exist.
More...

My wife is a *very* attractive attorney. I do have other forms of income though (all passive), but, trading is > 80% of what I make in a year.

I have made and lost in one month what she's made in a year...she understands the business and associated risk. It's never been an issue. That, and she enjoys the fact that I love what I do.

Since I live in CA (a small coastal town), I think the women here are different and your opinion stems from knowing too many NYC women. I would tend to believe that a typical NYC gal has a different outlook on finances and stability in a place like Manhattan. I personally think you city guys need to get out and explore a bit, and, possibly look at yourselves and do some self-analysis and self reflection. People tend to attract others who are very similar; if you have insecurity and can't be honest with yourself; then guess what? That's probably what you're going to have in any relationship, she won't respect you because you don't respect yourself.

In general, you either marry/date the wrong girl or the right girl, but, you better have yourself figured out first. It's not gonna matter what you do for a living, the wrong girl will be condescending and disrespecful no matter what. If you're attracted to that type of thing, or keep pursuing a relationship that shows signs of pettiness, then you get what you asked for.
 
Thanks, Mike. Excellent points and real life example

A warning however---

I too WAS married to an attorney-- be cautious when they turn on you and the divorce follows .... It can be brutal.
 
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