Those are good points. i agree that there is a bit of conflict. I will likely just trade the combine account next time to have absolute focus. My trading in NQ would not be good at all for a combine. I do less trimming, trade it a lot less, basically not as good of a day trading instrument for me.
I feel like the styles of my trading still will work in the combine. The entries are the same, the exits are the same. The only change is closing the runner out end of day. Could this be a huge mental block? I guess it could be. I believe it's an adjustment I can make.
I believe the funded account is more important at the moment. This may sound a bit weird, but here goes. Trading for me is a bit lonely, which in a way I love, because I get to be in control of everything. On the other hand, I know 0 people who trade, and have met 0 people who trade. It's quite the mountain to climb without any support. I feel for me, having even a little contact with others just adjusts my mind a bit to feel apart of something. That contact could even just be a check once a month. Even the idea that someone is watching and judging would have an impact for me personally.
To be honest, I actually felt even more tense trading in sim, it felt entirely real to me. We all know this is about the money, but without execution there won't be any. I really don't expect to be making gazillions in a day, but I do believe my personal goals are attainable. 10 points a week per lot after commission. If I trade mostly 2's, I'm looking 20 points. If it takes me 5 years to do it consistently, so be it.