Just did a calculation and my monthly recurring expenses total $3000. That's 8% from my current balance. Every month, just to have buy something such as food, I need to make more than a 8% return. Anything short of that will be trouble. Negative months will be trouble. I think I just truly realized the seriousness of what I am doing. I am literally standing on the verge of a cliff, trying to balance myself while doing two things simultaneously: working full-time and secretly trading stocks. If I end up with a loss like I did today, that is a seriously blow to my account that could screw my whole life up.
This is the biggest and the boldest thing I've ever done in my life of 24 years. I might look back and regret my choice. I'm really not sure if I'm actually sane at the moment. All the logical thinking in the world is telling me not to do it. It's telling me to return my loans and go back into my stable lifestyle. Build little by little, no matter how long it takes. That is what a sane person would do. That is what a "normal" person would do. Yet I think I have it. I think I can pull it off. It just doesn't make any sense at all but I really think I can do it. And I think I'm going to regret it if I indeed had what it took, but did not believe in myself to go through with it. Not trying to be cheesy but the saying "do what your heart tells you.." When you like a girl go for it. When you want to go on an adventure go for it. When you love something so much go for it. People call that courage. I don't think the saying applies in the way I'm going to use it, but yea... there is something that's just telling me I can do it. Tomorrow I'm going to give my 2-week notice. I'm going to trade full-time. All I've practiced, all I've studied... either I perform or I don't. It's a true do or die situation now. Its not a game anymore. It's life itself. Let my 20's truly begin.