I'm a Buddhist and I couldn't agree with you more. By no means am I a therapist or psychologist, although with the amount of therapy I've been through I should be, LOL, but I have learned that attempting to avoid "pain and suffering" is actually not a healthy thing.
The healthy thing is to go head to head with that pain and suffering and to rise above it. In doing so you overcome the pain and suffering.
I assure you, if a violent criminal entered a temple to cause harm, no amount of meditation or smiles will stop the pain and suffering that person wants to inflict. But kicking the violent persons butt and stopping them would bring a large amount of peace and smiles to those that survive. ;-)