The Chuck Norris thread

[William Rennick]

Bring home all the troops in Iraq, send in Norris. Should have the mess cleaned up before sundown.

 

[William Rennick]

Chuck Norris shorts the Market on upticks, downticks and whatever kind of tick he pleases.

 

[nutmeg]

Chuck Norris goes to bars and slips roofies into his own drink in hopes of getting picked up. (off the floor, booyah)

 

[William Rennick]

Chuck Norris has his chest trimmed with a golf course gang mower.

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[William Rennick]

If Chuck Norris had been around, the President would have dropped him on Hiroshima.

 

[Yours truly]

Chuch Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has Never cried!

 

[Optionspoet]

Chuck Norris cannot predict the future; the future just better fucking do what Chuck Norris says.

 

[Optionspoet]

Before Chuck Norris was born, the martial arts weapons with two pieces of wood connected by a chain were called NunBarrys. No one ever did find out what happened to Barry.

 

[Optionspoet]

Chuck Norris can make a paraplegic run for his life.

 

[nitro]

Quote from William Rennick:

When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he stands still, the planet moves.

Hehehehheheh

nitro