President George W. Bush was scheduled to visit the
Episcopal Church outside Washington as part of his campaign to
restore his pathetic poll standings.
His image handler made a visit to the Bishop and
said, "We've been getting a lot of bad publicity because of the president's position on stem cell research, the Iraq war, hurricane Katrina, and the Veterans Administration.
We'll make a $100,000 contribution to your church if
during your sermon you will say that the President is a saint.
The Bishop thought it over for a few moments and
finally said, "The Church
is desperate for funding - I'll do it."
Bush showed up for the sermon and the Bishop began:
"I'd like to speak to you all this morning about our
is a liar, a cheat, and a low-intelligence
weasel. He took the tragedy of September 11 and used it to frighten and manipulate the American people.
"He lied about weapons of mass destruction and
invaded Iraq for oil and money, caus ing the deaths of tens of thousands and making the United States the most hated country on earth. "
"He appointed cronies to positions of power and
influence, leading to
widespread death and destruction during Hurricane
Katrina. He awarded contracts and tax cuts to his rich friends so that we now have more poverty in this country and a greater gap between rich and poor than we've had since the Depression. "He has headed the most corrupt, bribe-inducing political party since Teapot Dome. "The national surplus has turned into a staggering national debt of 7.6
trillion Dollars, gas prices are up 85%, which the
people of America cannot afford, and vital research into global warming and stem cells is stopped cold because he's afraid to lose votes from religious kooks.
"He is the worst example of a true Christian I've
ever known.
"But compared to Dick Cheney, George W. Bush is a
saint."
Episcopal Church outside Washington as part of his campaign to
restore his pathetic poll standings.
His image handler made a visit to the Bishop and
said, "We've been getting a lot of bad publicity because of the president's position on stem cell research, the Iraq war, hurricane Katrina, and the Veterans Administration.
We'll make a $100,000 contribution to your church if
during your sermon you will say that the President is a saint.
The Bishop thought it over for a few moments and
finally said, "The Church
is desperate for funding - I'll do it."
Bush showed up for the sermon and the Bishop began:
"I'd like to speak to you all this morning about our
is a liar, a cheat, and a low-intelligence
weasel. He took the tragedy of September 11 and used it to frighten and manipulate the American people.
"He lied about weapons of mass destruction and
invaded Iraq for oil and money, caus ing the deaths of tens of thousands and making the United States the most hated country on earth. "
"He appointed cronies to positions of power and
influence, leading to
widespread death and destruction during Hurricane
Katrina. He awarded contracts and tax cuts to his rich friends so that we now have more poverty in this country and a greater gap between rich and poor than we've had since the Depression. "He has headed the most corrupt, bribe-inducing political party since Teapot Dome. "The national surplus has turned into a staggering national debt of 7.6
trillion Dollars, gas prices are up 85%, which the
people of America cannot afford, and vital research into global warming and stem cells is stopped cold because he's afraid to lose votes from religious kooks.
"He is the worst example of a true Christian I've
ever known.
"But compared to Dick Cheney, George W. Bush is a
saint."