Stealth Wealth

[trader99]

You're not providing enough information.

For example, those relatives of your that you're talking about...they live on the same street, in another city, in another state or in another country ???

Do you talk to them only on the telephone or do they come by your home several times per month ???

You close to them or you actually treat them like friends ???

Remember one thing about "super competitive" people...they are not going to ask you were your income is coming from and the exception ones that do...don't tell them. Keep your mouth shut.

It won't matter to them because they are still going to be "super competitive".

Yet, if you're that one that's "super competitive" too...you'll probably flaunt what you have and that may be the reason why you're thinking to much about hiding your wealth after letting the secret out.

Also, if they're on your spouse side of the family...don't tell them shit and tell your spouse its none of their business even if they drop by for a surprise visit and they say wow...nice house, nice car and your kids go to private school...

Don't explain anything especially if they start asking questions about your wealth. People with money biggest problem is that they specifically talk about the money they have. They do not know how to keep their mouth shut.

• That's the best way to be in stealth mode about your wealth although its strange that you refer to it as "stealth mode fashion" as if you have a history of flaunting money.

Simply, live your life the way you want and don't invite over the "super competitive" family members. Easy to do if they don't live in the same city, state or country as you. A lot harder to do if they live on the same street or within a 30 minute driving distance.

Yet, if they don't even live in the same city as you do...you're wasting too much time & energy with this.

P.S. Never quit your job especially during a Pandemic and especially if its the source of your healthcare benefits and insurance policy. You're doing ok the way things are with your income source...don't fuck it up...leave it as is.

It's a Pandemic and shit can change very quickly for you in a bad way the very next day.

wrbtrader

We live in the same city. The most competitive sister lives like literally 8 minutes drive from me. My family is very close to each other. She invites everyone over for dinner pretty regularly.

She's obviously very showy. More humblebrag. Just to be clear, I love my family and we are close. Just that growing up in a family of overachievers who are supercompetitive is tiring.

There was a period in my life when I was down in my life - my first few years trying daytrading. I was laughed at. Total derision. Thought of as a total loser for trying to daytrade after having having a great corporate job and graduated from a top school. I wasted about 2 years with little to no income. I was the black sheep of the family.

Then I gave up daytrading. Then went back to corporate world ever since. Then in the last few years traded again with much better success this time around while holding down jobs and now my own consulting company.

I do NOT have a history of flaunting. The thing about me is that I'm not competitive. I just do my thing. I don't like to bring this up. Other people in the same situation as me(even without trading success) would be way more SHOWY!

For example, the supercompetitive sister said, "you know your neighborhood has the highest
mello-roos(part of property taxes) in the ENTIRE city! Even higher than my neighborhood."

I didn't say anything. I know the pain every 6 months. I just nodded. So for competitive people, they compare every little thing down to that level. For me, who gives a FUCK?! My wife and I wanted a nice hood with good schools. So we bought this place.And now we have to pay high property taxes. It's NOT a point I would show off. But for competitive people they would.

That's the difference between me and supercompetitive people. That's why I hated the corporate world so much. In many jobs, people who sabotage, attack, and even outright lie and slander me to get ahead.

Maybe I should stop being such a doormat! I do well on my talent and hardwork and I don't want to compete. The world is full of talentless mean spirited people who try to pull you down to their levels.

Maybe I should start being a-hole and speak up rather than allow these competitive people step all over me so they can feel better about themselves.

 

[MarkBrown]

Maybe I should start being a-hole and speak up rather than allow these competitive people step all over me so they can feel better about themselves.

if you need a-hole lessons - i'm your man just look at my post thru the years on et - i can rip an ass

otherwise you should just keep quite from now on and expect your most humbling day is yet to come.

 

[trader99]

if you need a-hole lessons - i'm your man just look at my post thru the years on et - i can rip an ass

otherwise you should just keep quite from now on and expect your most humbling day is yet to come.

I'm ALWAYS humble when it comes to the market. I've been plenty humbled BY the market. Expensive lessons over the years.

I'm talking about personality to deal with other a-holes in the world. Not about $ or trading.

Just how to be self assertive.

 

[wrbtrader]

We live in the same city. The most competitive sister lives like literally 8 minutes drive from me. My family is very close to each other. She invites everyone over for dinner pretty regularly.

She's obviously very showy. More humblebrag. Just to be clear, I love my family and we are close. Just that growing up in a family of overachievers who are supercompetitive is tiring.

There was a period in my life when I was down in my life - my first few years trying daytrading. I was laughed at. Total derision. Thought of as a total loser for trying to daytrade after having having a great corporate job and graduated from a top school. I wasted about 2 years with little to no income. I was the black sheep of the family.

Then I gave up daytrading. Then went back to corporate world ever since. Then in the last few years traded again with much better success this time around while holding down jobs and now my own consulting company.

I do NOT have a history of flaunting. The thing about me is that I'm not competitive. I just do my thing. I don't like to bring this up. Other people in the same situation as me(even without trading success) would be way more SHOWY!

For example, the supercompetitive sister said, "you know your neighborhood has the highest
mello-roos(part of property taxes) in the ENTIRE city! Even higher than my neighborhood."

I didn't say anything. I know the pain every 6 months. I just nodded. So for competitive people, they compare every little thing down to that level. For me, who gives a FUCK?! My wife and I wanted a nice hood with good schools. So we bought this place.And now we have to pay high property taxes. It's NOT a point I would show off. But for competitive people they would.

That's the difference between me and supercompetitive people. That's why I hated the corporate world so much. In many jobs, people who sabotage, attack, and even outright lie and slander me to get ahead.

Maybe I should stop being such a doormat! I do well on my talent and hardwork and I don't want to compete. The world is full of talentless mean spirited people who try to pull you down to their levels.

Maybe I should start being a-hole and speak up rather than allow these competitive people step all over me so they can feel better about themselves.

Just let them talk while you remain quiet...give them no input about your money. Thus, let them imagine what your net worth is about but give them no verification.

Your consistent silence about money with them will send a loud and clear message to them...

• Its none of their business.

The noisy ones...just say its none of your business. If you owe them any money...pay them off first prior to buying things like a 2nd home.

wrbtrader

 

[MarkBrown]

I'm ALWAYS humble when it comes to the market. I've been plenty humbled BY the market. Expensive lessons over the years.

I'm talking about personality to deal with other a-holes in the world. Not about $ or trading.

Just how to be self assertive.

be bold blunt and direct to the point in all cases and don't stress over baggage life is too short.

 

[trader99]

Just let them talk while you remain quiet...give them no input about your money. Thus, let them imagine what your net worth is about but give them no verification.

Your consistent silence about money with them will send a loud and clear message to them...

• Its none of their business.

The noisy ones...just say its none of your business. If you owe them any money...pay them off first prior to buying things like a 2nd home.

wrbtrader

good suggestions. They are not as balded as asking directly about net worth. But when they talk about vacation plans, I add that my wife and I plan to travel to X, Y,Z as well. And they looked very surprised. How can this be?

I don't owe them anything. lol.

I'll probably pay off my current home before buying a 2nd home. Given how low my mortgage rate is I know from a pure financial opportunity cost that I can earn higher from trading. But from a de-leveraging personal perspective, I would still want to pay off the mortgage off before getting a 2nd home.

But I have this strange(maybe not too strange given where the Fed is going) feeling that after I pay off my mortgage, the Fed will come out with negative rates! Then I can refi rates to 0% or negative. haha. That day might come within the next 5 years. Is it worth it to wait on that predictions? Or just pay it off and move on with my life and feel deleveraged.

 

[trader99]

be bold blunt and direct to the point in all cases and don't stress over baggage life is too short.

thanks Mark!

 

[Nobert]

For example, the supercompetitive sister said, "you know your neighborhood has the highest
mello-roos(part of property taxes) in the ENTIRE city! Even higher than my neighborhood."

I didn't say anything. I know the pain every 6 months. I just nodded. So for competitive people, they compare every little thing down to that level. For me, who gives a FUCK?! My wife and I wanted a nice hood with good schools. So we bought this place.And now we have to pay high property taxes. It's NOT a point I would show off. But for competitive people they would.

That's the difference between me and supercompetitive people. That's why I hated the corporate world so much. In many jobs, people who sabotage, attack, and even outright lie and slander me to get ahead.

Hmnn. Interesting. Haven't given much time to think about such type of competition.

If their competitive nature, eventually, does not - manifest, (at least partially) into the desire to do ,,good for the world'', then what's the point of it ?

Just - to be better ?

The society in itself, simply by it's being/existence , allows you to become better & even more if you're achiever, e.g - imagine one is isolated in a distant island. Well, without a doubt - one would be ,,the best'' on that island, but without the society, it's deformed, delusional.

Maybe their competition levels are in the line, but ego - out of control.

One way or another, that sounds like a deformed type of competition, disgusting.


Eureka :

Thanks for the suggestion. What pretentious bullshiet? They are my siblings. They all know what schools I went to. That's part of the jealousy too. But it's benign. What they are competing for now is $$.

I want to lay low. They are overt people. One of my siblings who recently got promoted to VP want to upgrade her lifestyle and get a ranch home, etc.

She even asked if I want to chip in. I tell her all of my capital is tied up in my small biz. Can't do much.

Personally I think it's a money sink to do what she's trying to do. But she has big ego and will not listen anyways. Better to gaslight and act poor then give wise advice that people will not listen anyways and have them get angry at you.

That's a perfect definition of my aunt, who's a - VP as well (big smile).
Are we discovering some pattern here....




Oh, back to your story, - i would bring out, the fact about your success. Be it by luxury car or some other way.
Heal them with their own medicine.

And it's always tons & tons of people, out there, who needs help. Specially kidos. Seing zero problems with dropping all of that ,,family thing'' (beside, they already are doing well) and dedicating ones effort towards those who needs it most (and you might even become a ,,hero'' in their eyes'')

timestamped :

 

[Nobert]

Hmnn. Interesting. Haven't given much time to think about such type of competition.

If their competitive nature, eventually, does not - manifest, (at least partially) into the desire to do ,,good for the world'', then what's the point of it ?

Just - to be better ?

The society in itself, simply by it's being/existence , allows you to become better & even more if you're achiever, e.g - imagine one is isolated in a distant island. Well, without a doubt - one would be ,,the best'' on that island, but without the society, it's deformed, delusional.

Maybe their competition levels are in the line, but ego - out of control.

One way or another, that sounds like a deformed type of competition, disgusting.


Eureka :



That's a perfect definition of my aunt, who's a - VP as well (big smile).
Are we discovering some pattern here....




Oh, back to your story, - i would bring out, the fact about your success. Be it by luxury car or some other way.
Heal them with their own medicine.

And it's always tons & tons of people, out there, who needs help. Specially kidos. Seing zero problems with dropping all of that ,,family thing'' (beside, they already are doing well) and dedicating ones effort towards those who needs it most (and you might even become a ,,hero'' in their eyes'')

timestamped :

P.s. and thanks for the link from Financial Samurai, good read.