Devil: “MaximumPossibleSuffering, I have been watching you over the years and with a handle like yours, I said to myself, ‘There is a man with potential’”. You’ve disappointed me with your anti-war stance and cost me a bet”.
“Although up to this point I’ve only dealt in souls, I am here to make you an offer not so committing on your part”. Trump will lose the 2020 Presidential elect-“
MPS: “How do I know you are not lying”?
Devil: “The rules require informed consent on any deals. Ask God”.
MPS: “I don’t seem to have his phone num-“
Devil: “You stupid or something”? “Ask him”.
God: “It’s true, Donald Trump loses the 2020 Presidency”.
MPS: “Damn, it is actually true”. “How is that possible”? “Ok, what is the deal”.
Devil: “I can make it so Trump wins in 2020 in exchange for you sacrificing any single poster’s life you want on ET”. “Which poster is it going to be”?
MPS: Your deal is not acceptable.
Devil: “Surely you know a Democratic President could screw up all you hold dear”. God damn it, what’s it going to take?”. “Oops, sorry God”.
God: “No worries”.
MPS: “I am no wise enough to foresee what will actually happen in the future”. “I believe the most fundamental consideration in choosing our leadership is respecting our electoral process, even if some people attempt to unfairly manipulate it”. “We must recognize our duly elected new leader and work with them until at least their ideas are consistently and thoroughly refuted”.
Devil: “God, this guy has done it to me again”.
God: “Quit whining and pay up”.