mama vivian's trades

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hi viv

first of all ... have a nice weekend

secondly ...

when you started with the 20K

were you trading smaller size?

1-2 ES ? or were you shooting 5-10 lots

position wise at a time since you began

trading this acct?

also .... if you have a drawdown ... will you consider doing less size ?

good luck

seth
 
Seth
when i started at 20K i was trading 2 or 3 lots and when i lose i go down according to a very firm cash schedule. and the same is if i win.
 
all I can say is that I feel really terrible for two reasons:
ive had losing trades and I can honestly say that I was starting to lose my courage to post those trades. Ive been trying to present myself as someone who doesn't care about this money and trade carefree. but the last three trading days have been horrible. I don't feel bad that I lost because I did everything I was suppose to. but i skipped my posts because I was scared of what everyone here would think of me. it is sure easy to be a winner and have everyone look up to you but i can now see how a trader could change from there plan in the middle of bad moments.
I feel bad that i didn't post for three days and I said I had the courage to do so eaven if I lose.
sorry guys. this is sure harder than I thought it would be. Im not going to change my plan. Im not going to lose courage.
I feel like im in the middle of a heart to heart with my children and im one of the children.
 

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viv hun,

I am not sure if posting on ET about your trades is good. The purpose of trading is to make money, and can you truly say that posting your journal is not affecting your trading?

Is this really worth it?

This is a fun Journal and I think you are a great gal.

There is a piece of Mama in all of us. Every trader goes through what you are going through.

I sure hope that this experience on ET can be a positive experience.

Michael B.
 
There isnt a trader who doesnt feel like that at some point! Hang in there unless you start to feel that "its not for you". Good trading to you!
 
Hi Vivian,

You are up more than 20% even after your recent draw down. Your recent debits can be considered nothing more than normal noise.

The emotional stuff is what makes this different than papertrading. Learning to manage your/our emotions and not hang your/our self worth on anything the market does is important. That is why it is important to follow your rules - that you DO have control of. No one really knows what this feels like unless they've gone through what you are going through now.

Having faith that your system will have a net positive expectancy over many iterations of trades is key. How, may I ask, did you come by your particular system of trading? IMHO, it is important to develop your own style which is suited to your personal make up.

(Best thoughts and welcome to the club. I look forward to your response.)

Peace and gtty,

Lar
 
I think the postings may introduce more fixations in your trading and when things fail to unfold as expected (fixation), more stress will be on you. You might want to post just the monthly statement or something with a longer perspective. I don't think it is realistic to think that one will not have losing streak or a losing month. Posting trades are not gonna help with the honesty issue beyond the initial point (looking at the numbers). Also have you thought about just automate your system?
 
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