Just like with freedom of religion, monogamy should be an unconditional free choice.

[Optionpro007]

As I stated previously, I think there is nothing wrong with choosing to be monogamous or not. Just like Christianity or choosing to be a Muslim, 'nothing has to be' for everybody.

I commend Wallet for his choice to remain faithful to his wife and his promises. (it is left to wonder though, if Wallet went out of his way to remain monogamous or he never had a chance) Big difference. Still, a man or woman who keeps his or her word regardless of the promise, is always something to respect and honor.

Either way is good as long as the person remains true to itself and his or her partner. Truth about delineating exactly what constitutes or what it means to be faithful or not and where the line is drawn.

That being said I will start pointing out the fallacy of monogamy in humans from stories that come up. Obviously there are thousands upon thousands of instances that I could point out but for now I will just keep pointing out fresh evidence of the premise of this thread.

http://www.cnn.com/2010/LIVING/01/23/new.york.phillips.billboard/index.html?hpt=T2

 

[Barth Vader]

Quote from Wallet:

The answer for divorce is, do not get married unless you intend to honor your vows. Part of those voes are the topic of this thread, monogamy.

The concept of marriage in today's society has been watered down to more of a legal "going steady". I'd say a good percentage of people get married way to quick in a relationship with no intention of spending the rest of their lives together.

For a marriage to work, both parties need to put the others interests and needs on the same level as their own. Sometimes it's difficult, as I can personally attest, but it's the genuine respect for the other that motivates, Instead, today most people are selfish and self-centered.

Not touching the medical aspects of multiple sex partners, yes - monogamy is a personal choice, but once you stand there in front of your future spouse and promise/vow........ simply put, what kind of person you are will determine how you keep those promises.

Before you ask, still and only with my first love, 25+ years and going strong.

reagrds,

Very well stated, Wallet !

27+ years and it still seems like just yesterday......

 

[bigarrow]

Thing is you don't know if your wife was also faithful. I promise you there are many a wife who has strayed during a moment of weakness in an otherwise long term monogamous relationship. And no there is no way to know for sure if your wife has cheated or not.

 

[rcaldwell]

A very good point as it is popular to point the finger at the male. Female is much more cunning and rationalizes her infidelity.

 

[peilthetraveler]

Quote from Optionpro007:

After seeing 'the truth' come out of many well known personalities, I think it is stupid to expect everybody to be monogamous.

So basically what you are saying is that what you see on TV is truth. That morals should be dictated by wealthy celebrities? Is that what you are saying? Because thats basically what you said.


As for my comment earlier where i got the "looney bin" comment, I was speaking sarcastically. Of course I dont think people should steal and murder, but we expect that people shouldnt steal or murder. I think its a safe bet though to say that everyone reading this has stolen something at least once in their life though. Does that mean we shouldnt expect everyone to not steal since everyone has done it? I say the same with monogamy. Alot of people cheat, but does that mean we should throw out those morals?

And I just have to say that there is no law that says you have to be monogamous. It is a free choice already. But if you promise to someone and enter into a contract with them (like marriage) you are promising to not cheat and only be with them. If you break that, then you are in breach of contract. Nobody forced you to get married and stay with one person.

 

[trendlover]

Quote from peilthetraveler:


And I just have to say that there is no law that says you have to be monogamous. It is a free choice already. But if you promise to someone and enter into a contract with them (like marriage) you are promising to not cheat and only be with them. If you break that, then you are in breach of contract. Nobody forced you to get married and stay with one person. [/B]

Peilthetraveler, I fight with you all the time on ET, but this post of you make sense. No one force the man to get married. So why do they get married if they want to have alot of girlfriends?
Just have alot of girlfriends and do not get married.
So if they want to get married AND have alot of girlfriends, that mean they will not care if thier wife have alot of boyfriends too. Because like the poster say, "it should be free choice"

 

[ak15]

Quote from peilthetraveler:


...As for my comment earlier where i got the "looney bin" comment, I was speaking sarcastically...

You were "speaking sarcastically?" That is a bunch of baloney. You meant every word of it. As the last line in that post of yours says - you were "trying to justify your reasoning to be immoral."

"I dont know...maybe im just trying to justify my reasoning to be immorral. That sounds about right."

 

[peilthetraveler]

Quote from ak15:

You were "speaking sarcastically?" That is a bunch of baloney. You meant every word of it. As the last line in that post of yours says - you were "trying to justify your reasoning to be immoral."

"I dont know...maybe im just trying to justify my reasoning to be immorral. That sounds about right."

Murder & theivery is in the hearts of every man. It affects men regardless of their background, whether they are rich or poor, black or white, smart or dumb. But do you really think I would want murder & theivery to be a freedom?

 

[drjekyllus]

Quote from Optionpro007:



Reality is that in some people monogamy goes against their deepest human instinct

If it is instinct driven it does not sound like free will at all.

 

[ak15]

Quote from peilthetraveler:

Murder & theivery is in the hearts of every man. It affects men regardless of their background, whether they are rich or poor, black or white, smart or dumb. But do you really think I would want murder & theivery to be a freedom?

You were morally justifying "murder and thievery" by saying that:

"Yeah I think its stupid for people to expect everyone not to steal. Not taking something you want if you cant get it by any other means goes against peoples deepest human instinct and the more you don't take what you want, the more you will want it."

People with an internal value system don't steal, period. All of us in our daily lives have many opportunities to steal. However, those amongst us who lead our lives based on principles and scruples do not steal. We may covet "something" but will only procure it by legal means. If we can't do so, then we make do without it.

"Also, I think its stupid for people to expect everyone not to murder each other. When someone makes you mad or is making your life hell, you just want to kill them. Death is a natural thing, so ending someones life a little sooner if they are making your life miserable is just a natural instinct and repressing that instinct will just make it manifest itself more and make you unhappy if you don't kill them."

It is puerile to even think along these lines. We, as a society, neither "expect" nor desire people to engage in murder. "When someone makes you mad or is making your life hell," you don't "want to kill them." You may be displeased but would not think of killing the person who upset you unless you're devoid of moral guidelines. The same goes for trying to end "someones life a little sooner if they are making your life miserable." Not only is it not a "natural instinct" it goes against the very fabric of civilized society. I would find this amusing were it not for the gravity of your words in stating that "repressing" such an "instinct" to kill would make one "unhappy" if he/she ends up not killing the person/persons who evoked such emotions.
Finally "murder and thievery" are not prevalent in the "hearts of every man." They only find a place in the thoughts and machinations of evil people, those that are devoid of moral integrity.