Jokes
- Thread starter dgabriel
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Subject: Irish Painting
At the National Art Gallery in Dublin, a husband and wife were staring at a portrait that had them completely confused. The painting depicted three black men totally naked sitting on a park bench.
Two of the figures had black penises, but the one in the middle had a pink penis.
The curator of the gallery realized that they were having trouble interpreting the painting and offered his assessment. He went on for over half an hour explaining how it depicted the sexual emasculation of African-Americans in a predominately white, patriarchal society. "In fact" he pointed out, "some serious critics believe that the pink penis also reflects the cultural and sociological oppression experienced by gay men in contemporary society."
After the curator left, an old Irishman, approached the couple and said, "Would you like to know what the painting is really about?"
"Now why would you claim to be more of an expert than the curator of the gallery?" asked the couple.
"Because I'm the guy who painted it," he replied.
"In fact, there's no African-Americans depicted at all. They're just three Irish coal-miners. The guy in the middle went home for lunch."
At the National Art Gallery in Dublin, a husband and wife were staring at a portrait that had them completely confused. The painting depicted three black men totally naked sitting on a park bench.
Two of the figures had black penises, but the one in the middle had a pink penis.
The curator of the gallery realized that they were having trouble interpreting the painting and offered his assessment. He went on for over half an hour explaining how it depicted the sexual emasculation of African-Americans in a predominately white, patriarchal society. "In fact" he pointed out, "some serious critics believe that the pink penis also reflects the cultural and sociological oppression experienced by gay men in contemporary society."
After the curator left, an old Irishman, approached the couple and said, "Would you like to know what the painting is really about?"
"Now why would you claim to be more of an expert than the curator of the gallery?" asked the couple.
"Because I'm the guy who painted it," he replied.
"In fact, there's no African-Americans depicted at all. They're just three Irish coal-miners. The guy in the middle went home for lunch."
Osama at the Pearly Gates
When Osama bin Laden died, George Washington met him at the Pearly Gates. He
slapped him across the face and yelled, "How dare you try to destroy the
nation I helped conceive!"
Patrick Henry approached, punched him in the nose and shouted, "You wanted
to end our liberties but you failed!"
James Madison followed, kicked him in the groin and said, "This is why I
allowed our government to provide for the common defense!"
Thomas Jefferson was next, beat Osama with a long cane and snarled, "It was
evil men like you who inspired me to write the Declaration of Independence."
The beatings and thrashings continued as George Mason, James Monroe and 66
other early Americans unleashed their anger on the terrorist leader.
As Osama lay bleeding and in pain, an Angel appeared. Bin Laden wept and
said, "This is not what you promised me."
The Angel replied, "I told! you there would be 72 Virginians waiting for you
in Heaven. What did you think I said?"
When Osama bin Laden died, George Washington met him at the Pearly Gates. He
slapped him across the face and yelled, "How dare you try to destroy the
nation I helped conceive!"
Patrick Henry approached, punched him in the nose and shouted, "You wanted
to end our liberties but you failed!"
James Madison followed, kicked him in the groin and said, "This is why I
allowed our government to provide for the common defense!"
Thomas Jefferson was next, beat Osama with a long cane and snarled, "It was
evil men like you who inspired me to write the Declaration of Independence."
The beatings and thrashings continued as George Mason, James Monroe and 66
other early Americans unleashed their anger on the terrorist leader.
As Osama lay bleeding and in pain, an Angel appeared. Bin Laden wept and
said, "This is not what you promised me."
The Angel replied, "I told! you there would be 72 Virginians waiting for you
in Heaven. What did you think I said?"
http://www.trendax.com/
Make sure you go through the flash version and press all the buttons on the bottom (turn up your sound to hear the audio fx). I haven't laughed so hard in a long time. Man, oh man...
[the site is Kimble's creation. He is an ego with legs who pretended he was a hacker - he was found guilty of securities fraud a while back and tried to run away from the law in East Asia but they got him. Now he's playing pretend hedge fund ]
Make sure you go through the flash version and press all the buttons on the bottom (turn up your sound to hear the audio fx). I haven't laughed so hard in a long time. Man, oh man...
[the site is Kimble's creation. He is an ego with legs who pretended he was a hacker - he was found guilty of securities fraud a while back and tried to run away from the law in East Asia but they got him. Now he's playing pretend hedge fund ]
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