The Washington Post's Mensa Invitational once
again asked readers to take any word from the
dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or
changing one letter, and supply a new definition.
Here are this year's winners:
1. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax
refund, which lasts until you realize it was your
money to start with.
2. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.
3. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding
stupid people that stops bright ideas from
penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows
little sign of breaking down in the near future.
4. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself
for the purpose of getting laid.
5. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house,
which renders the subject financially impotent for
an indefinite period.
6. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
7. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of
sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
8. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when
you are running late.
9. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.
10. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one
got extra credit.)
11. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is
sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And
then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a
serious bummer.
12. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of
getting through the day consuming only things that are
good for you.
13. Glibido: All talk and no action.
14. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas
to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.
15. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic
dance performed just after you've accidentally
walked through a spider web.
16. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a
mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the
morning and cannot be cast out.
17. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after
finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.
And the pick of the literature:
18. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.
again asked readers to take any word from the
dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or
changing one letter, and supply a new definition.
Here are this year's winners:
1. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax
refund, which lasts until you realize it was your
money to start with.
2. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.
3. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding
stupid people that stops bright ideas from
penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows
little sign of breaking down in the near future.
4. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself
for the purpose of getting laid.
5. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house,
which renders the subject financially impotent for
an indefinite period.
6. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
7. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of
sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
8. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when
you are running late.
9. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.
10. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one
got extra credit.)
11. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is
sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And
then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a
serious bummer.
12. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of
getting through the day consuming only things that are
good for you.
13. Glibido: All talk and no action.
14. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas
to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.
15. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic
dance performed just after you've accidentally
walked through a spider web.
16. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a
mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the
morning and cannot be cast out.
17. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after
finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.
And the pick of the literature:
18. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.
