Jokes 2

[fhl]

The Army is an attractive occupational choice for many coming out of inner city schools.

You get to travel to exotic, distant lands. Meet exciting, unusual people, and kill them.

 

[fhl]

The National Center for Disease Control recently did a survey on men who have tried a Camel.

They found that nine out of ten of them preferred women.

 

[abattia]

Quote from nutmeg:

I'm sorry to hear that two helicopter pilots have died in a crash in the French region of Tourrettes.

Anyone want to guess what their last words were?

......?

 

[fhl]

<img src="http://i209.photobucket.com/albums/bb98/batdog295/AliceKramden.jpg" alt="some_text"/>

 

[nutmeg]

<object width="480" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/xfJXgKTqpdE?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/xfJXgKTqpdE?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object>

 

[Picaso]

Quote from Yannis:

Bible Study Humor

The Lord is my Shepherd, and that's all I need to know.

LOL

 

[nutmeg]

I've only faked an orgasm once, when I was being mugged.

That scared him off.

 

[abattia]

A man returns to his home after a day at the office to find his wife sobbing uncontrollably.

“What’s the matter?” he asks.

“Remember before we were married?” she replies. “That evening my father found us making love in your car? My father told me that I’d shamed him so much that unless I married you immediately he’d see to it that I went to prison for 25 years!””

“Yes, I remember! But why are you so upset?” he asks.

“Today is the day I would have been released!”

 

[nutmeg]

When life hands you..... Citric Acid (provides tartness), Potassium Citrate (controls acidity), Maltodextrin (from corn), Aspartame* (sweetener), Magnesium Oxide (prevents caking), contains less than 2% of Natural Flavor, Lemon Juice Solids, Acesulfame Potassium (sweetener), Artificial Color, Yellow 5 Lake, BHA (preserves freshness)
*Phenylketonurics: Contains Phenylalanine


make lemonade.

 

[mgookin]

Quote from nutmeg:

When life hands you..... Citric Acid (provides tartness), Potassium Citrate (controls acidity), Maltodextrin (from corn), Aspartame* (sweetener), Magnesium Oxide (prevents caking), contains less than 2% of Natural Flavor, Lemon Juice Solids, Acesulfame Potassium (sweetener), Artificial Color, Yellow 5 Lake, BHA (preserves freshness)
*Phenylketonurics: Contains Phenylalanine


...

You know you're in Amerika