Jokes 2

1. You refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to liquor.
You may be a Islamic terrorist
2. You own a $3,000 machine gun and $5,000 rocket launcher, but you can't afford shoes..
You may be a Islamic terrorist
3. You have more wives than teeth.
You may be a Islamic terrorist
4. You wipe your butt with your bare hand, but consider bacon unclean.
You may be a Islamic terrorist
5. You think vests come in two styles: bullet-proof and suicide.
You may be a Islamic terrorist
6. You can't think of anyone you haven't declared Jihad against.
You may be a Islamic terrorist
7. You consider television dangerous, but routinely carry explosives in your clothing.
You may be a Islamic terrorist
8. You were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other than setting off roadside bombs.
You may be a Islamic terrorist
9. You have nothing against women and think every man should own at least four.
You may be a Islamic terrorist
10. You pray to Allah, but he brings earthquakes & floods upon your ass.
You may be a Islamic terrorist
 
I was driving through Massachusetts. Had a little too much to drink.
Cop pulled me over and took me in. Had to go before the judge.

Judge says " do you know what you get for driving under the influence in this state?"

I said " I don't know. Re-election to the Senate?"
 
Nader couldn't get an iinterview with Cramer so ....

Wearing the same unpressed suit




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Next Season on Dancing with the Stars...

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:) :) :)
 

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