Mississippi Squirrel Revival
http://travisab1.multiply.com/video/item/73/The_Mississippi_Squirrel_Revival.flv
http://travisab1.multiply.com/video/item/73/The_Mississippi_Squirrel_Revival.flv
Jokes 2
- Thread starter gwb-trading
- Start date
Middle Eastern Conversation
At some hotel in Beirut , a Lebanese was eating his breakfast calmly: coffee, croissant, baguette, butter and jam. A Syrian tourist with a big chewing gum sat on the table in front of him. While the Lebanese ignored him, the Syrian started a conversation:
Syrian: you Lebanese, you eat all your bread?
Lebanese (in bad humour): yes.
Syrian (after making a big balloon with his chewing gum): we in Syria , we eat only the soft interior, and we put the outer part in containers, we recycle them to croissants and we sell them to the Lebanese.
The Syrian was smiling proudly, while the Lebanese listened silently. He persists: and you eat your jam with the bread?
Lebanese: yes.
Syrian (another big balloon noise): we in Syria , we eat fresh fruits at breakfast, and we put the peels and the seeds in containers, we recycle them to jam and sell them to Lebanese.
At that moment the Lebanese asked: do you make love in Syria?
Syrian (with a big smile): yeah sure, and a lot too.
Lebanese: and what do you do with the condoms?
Syrian: well, we throw them like everybody else in the world.
Lebanese: well, not us. Once we finish using our condoms, we put them in containers, we recycle them to chewing gums and we sell them to Syrians.
At some hotel in Beirut , a Lebanese was eating his breakfast calmly: coffee, croissant, baguette, butter and jam. A Syrian tourist with a big chewing gum sat on the table in front of him. While the Lebanese ignored him, the Syrian started a conversation:
Syrian: you Lebanese, you eat all your bread?
Lebanese (in bad humour): yes.
Syrian (after making a big balloon with his chewing gum): we in Syria , we eat only the soft interior, and we put the outer part in containers, we recycle them to croissants and we sell them to the Lebanese.
The Syrian was smiling proudly, while the Lebanese listened silently. He persists: and you eat your jam with the bread?
Lebanese: yes.
Syrian (another big balloon noise): we in Syria , we eat fresh fruits at breakfast, and we put the peels and the seeds in containers, we recycle them to jam and sell them to Lebanese.
At that moment the Lebanese asked: do you make love in Syria?
Syrian (with a big smile): yeah sure, and a lot too.
Lebanese: and what do you do with the condoms?
Syrian: well, we throw them like everybody else in the world.
Lebanese: well, not us. Once we finish using our condoms, we put them in containers, we recycle them to chewing gums and we sell them to Syrians.
This is an oldie but I like this version.
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An 80 year old man was having his annual check up and the doctor asked him how he was feeling. âIâve never been better!â he boasted. âIâve got an eighteen year old bride whoâs pregnant and having my child! What do you think about that?
The doctor considered this for a moment, then said, âLet me tell you a story. I knew a guy who was an avid hunter. He never missed a season. But one day went out in a bit of a hurry and he accidentally grabbed his umbrella instead of his gun. So he was in the woods and suddenly a grizzly bear appeared in front of him! He raised up his umbrella, pointed it at the bear and squeezed the handle, and do you know what happened?â the doctor queried.
Dumbfounded, the old man replied âNo.â
The doctor continued, âThe bear dropped dead in front of him!â
âThatâs impossible!â exclaimed the old man. âSomeone else must have shot that bear.â
âThatâs kind of what Iâm getting atâ¦â replied the doctor.
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An 80 year old man was having his annual check up and the doctor asked him how he was feeling. âIâve never been better!â he boasted. âIâve got an eighteen year old bride whoâs pregnant and having my child! What do you think about that?
The doctor considered this for a moment, then said, âLet me tell you a story. I knew a guy who was an avid hunter. He never missed a season. But one day went out in a bit of a hurry and he accidentally grabbed his umbrella instead of his gun. So he was in the woods and suddenly a grizzly bear appeared in front of him! He raised up his umbrella, pointed it at the bear and squeezed the handle, and do you know what happened?â the doctor queried.
Dumbfounded, the old man replied âNo.â
The doctor continued, âThe bear dropped dead in front of him!â
âThatâs impossible!â exclaimed the old man. âSomeone else must have shot that bear.â
âThatâs kind of what Iâm getting atâ¦â replied the doctor.
The talking dog..
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A bloke goes to buy a dog.
When he gets there, the dog says "Alright mate?"
The guy says " Feckin 'ell, seen it all now."
Dog says "I've won Crufts 5 times, been on t.v. shows, starred in 3 major blockbuster movies,sniffed out explosives in Iraq and run 8 marathons."
The guy says to the owner "So, why are you selling him then?"
The owner replies.....
.
.
.
.
......."Cos he's a lying c*nt"
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A bloke goes to buy a dog.
When he gets there, the dog says "Alright mate?"
The guy says " Feckin 'ell, seen it all now."
Dog says "I've won Crufts 5 times, been on t.v. shows, starred in 3 major blockbuster movies,sniffed out explosives in Iraq and run 8 marathons."
The guy says to the owner "So, why are you selling him then?"
The owner replies.....
.
.
.
.
......."Cos he's a lying c*nt"
Great material but some of you male traders may find the comedian's get up difficult to get beyond and if you like it,.... I'd be worried.
EASTER
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_XJfRzNOJNE
Darth Vader
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hp69rg6Hdlo
EASTER
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_XJfRzNOJNE
Darth Vader
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hp69rg6Hdlo