Jokes 2

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Quote from Wayne Gibbous:

Dumbass Home Depot customer...

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For a minute, I thought the Mexicans went to "highriders'.
 
The moon is more useful because the moon shines at night when you want the light, whereas the sun shines during the day when you don't need it.
 
Two camels were lounging around at the oasis discussing their humps, when the one uncrossed its legs, "Wait a minute. How come you have a camel toe and I don't?"
 
Here's what I did.

Hollow out a melon. Make a small hole in the side. Suspend it from the ceiling and swing it from side to side.

Now get a bowl of soggy Fruit Loops and attempt to spoon it into the swaying melon by pretending to be an airplane. Continue until half of the Fruit Loops are gone. Tip the rest into your lap, making sure that a lot of it falls on the floor.

You are now ready to feed baby.
 
A salesman rang the bell at a suburban home, and was greeted by a eight-year-old boy puffing on a long black cigar.

Hiding his amazement, the salesman asked the boy, "Is your mother home?"

The boy took the cigar slowly and deliberately out of his mouth, flicked ashes on the carpet, and asked, with a sideways glance: "What do you fucking think?"
 
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