Jokes 2

Kentucky State Trooper pulls over a pickup truck on the interstate. He says to the driver, "Got any ID? The driver says "Bout what?"
 
Did you hear about the Kentuckian who passed away and left his entire estate in trust for his beloved widow?

She can't touch it until she's fourteen.
 
Another Stab At Married Life

The judge frowned at the tired robber and said, “then you admit breaking into the same store on seven successive nights?”
”Yes, your honor.”
“And why was that?”
“Because my wife wanted a new dress.”
The judge checked again with his records, “But it says here you broke in seven nights in a row!”
“Yes sir. She made me exchange it six times.”

:) :) :)
 
My wife wanted the kitchen cabinets sanded and a new color. I thought is this a joke, it's going to cost you a couple cases of beer. So I sanded and stained. Then she didn't like the color, but for yoouu baby, same price for a new color. I took all the doors off and re sanded and stained to a new color. (sigh) on the third try I got it right. Pink, imagine that. Birch veneer cabinets stained pink.
 
I saw a woman in the laudramat I was attracted to and thought about trying to pick her up.

Then I thought, nah, if she can't even afford a washing machine, she'll never be able to support me.
 
Some men like to see a womans' breasts.

Other men like to watch a womans' behind as she walks.

Me, I like to see the top of a womans' head.
 
One day, after striking gold in Alaska, a lonesome miner came down from the mountains and walked into a saloon in the nearest town.

"I'm lookin' for the meanest, roughest and toughest whore in the Yukon," he said to the bartender.

"We got her," replied the barkeep. "She's upstairs in the second room on the right."

The miner handed the bartender a gold nugget to pay for the whore and two beers. He grabbed the beer bottles, stomped up the stairs, kicked open the second door on the right and yelled: "I'm lookin' for the meanest, roughest and toughest whore in the Yukon!"

The woman inside the room looked at the miner and said: "You found her!" Then she stripped naked, bent over and grabbed her ankles.

"How do you know I want to do it in that position?" asked the miner.

"I don't," replied the whore, "but I thought you might like to open those beers before we get started."
 
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