Jokes 2
- Thread starter gwb-trading
- Start date
My Rezimay
D eer Sur,
I waunt to apply for the secritary job I seen in the
Paper. I can type real kwik wit one finggar and do
Sum Acounting 2.
I think I am good on the fone and I am a pepole
Person. Pepole really seam to respond goodly to me.
I'm lookin for a jobb as a secritary but it Kant be 2
Complikaited
My spelling is not 2 good but find that I awfin get a
Job Bcuz of my persinalety..
My salerery is open so we can discus wat you want
To pay me and wat you think that I am wurth,
I can start imeditely. Thank you in advanse 4 yore
Anser.
Hopifuly I M Yore best aplicant so phar.
Sinseerly,
Peggy May McBiggins
PS : I half includeded a
Pick ture of me B low.
<img src=http://www.elitetrader.com/vb/attachment.php?s=&postid=2427054
D ear
Peggy May:
Start on Monday,
We have spell check.
D eer Sur,
I waunt to apply for the secritary job I seen in the
Paper. I can type real kwik wit one finggar and do
Sum Acounting 2.
I think I am good on the fone and I am a pepole
Person. Pepole really seam to respond goodly to me.
I'm lookin for a jobb as a secritary but it Kant be 2
Complikaited
My spelling is not 2 good but find that I awfin get a
Job Bcuz of my persinalety..
My salerery is open so we can discus wat you want
To pay me and wat you think that I am wurth,
I can start imeditely. Thank you in advanse 4 yore
Anser.
Hopifuly I M Yore best aplicant so phar.
Sinseerly,
Peggy May McBiggins
PS : I half includeded a
Pick ture of me B low.
<img src=http://www.elitetrader.com/vb/attachment.php?s=&postid=2427054
D ear
Peggy May:
Start on Monday,
We have spell check.
There are two sides to every divorce: Yours and Shithead's.
The closest I ever got to a 4.0 in college was my blood alcohol content.
I got a sweater for Christmas. I really wanted a screamer or a moaner.
If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the "terminal"?
No one ever says "It's only a game!" when their team is winning.
How long a minute is, depends on what side of the bathroom door you're
on.
Marriage changes passion...suddenly you're in bed with a relative
Why is it that most nudists are people you don't want to see naked?
The closest I ever got to a 4.0 in college was my blood alcohol content.
I got a sweater for Christmas. I really wanted a screamer or a moaner.
If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the "terminal"?
No one ever says "It's only a game!" when their team is winning.
How long a minute is, depends on what side of the bathroom door you're
on.
Marriage changes passion...suddenly you're in bed with a relative
Why is it that most nudists are people you don't want to see naked?
A dedicated Teamsters Union worker was attending a convention
in Las Vegas and decided to check out the local brothels. When
he got to the first one, he asked the Madam, "Is this a union
house?"
"No," she replied, "I'm sorry, it isn't."
"Well, if I pay you $100.00, what cut do the girls get?"
"The house gets $80.00 and the girls get $20.00."
Mightily offended at such unfair dealings, the man stomped off
down the street in search of a more equitable, hopefully unionized
shop. His search continued until finally he reached a brothel
where the Madam responded, "Why, yes, sir, this IS a Union House."
The man asked, "And if I pay you $100.00, what cut do the girls get?"
"The girls get $80.00 and the house gets $20.00."
"That's more like it!!!" the Teamster said. He handed the Madam $100.00,
looked around the room and pointed to a stunningly attractive blonde.
"I'd like her for the night."
"I'm sure you would, sir," said the Madam, then pointing to an 85
year-old woman in the corner, "but Ethel here has seniority."
in Las Vegas and decided to check out the local brothels. When
he got to the first one, he asked the Madam, "Is this a union
house?"
"No," she replied, "I'm sorry, it isn't."
"Well, if I pay you $100.00, what cut do the girls get?"
"The house gets $80.00 and the girls get $20.00."
Mightily offended at such unfair dealings, the man stomped off
down the street in search of a more equitable, hopefully unionized
shop. His search continued until finally he reached a brothel
where the Madam responded, "Why, yes, sir, this IS a Union House."
The man asked, "And if I pay you $100.00, what cut do the girls get?"
"The girls get $80.00 and the house gets $20.00."
"That's more like it!!!" the Teamster said. He handed the Madam $100.00,
looked around the room and pointed to a stunningly attractive blonde.
"I'd like her for the night."
"I'm sure you would, sir," said the Madam, then pointing to an 85
year-old woman in the corner, "but Ethel here has seniority."
Thatâs it. You guys win.
I always took the jokes here in my stride, seeing the humor behind the fat stupid American stereotype. Today I was shown that it isnât a stereotype.
I stopped in at Burger King on my way home from work because I didnât feel like cooking. A mother and her teenage son were in front of me and placed an order for a hamburger and a cheeseburger.
They took their food and went to sit down to eat. Before I could even finish placing my order, the mother and her son came storming back and yelled at the cashier for messing up their order.
The mother, who had ordered the cheeseburger, had no cheese, while the son has cheese on his hamburger. The three of them could not rectify this situation, and the cashier apologized and had the order re-made.
I always took the jokes here in my stride, seeing the humor behind the fat stupid American stereotype. Today I was shown that it isnât a stereotype.
I stopped in at Burger King on my way home from work because I didnât feel like cooking. A mother and her teenage son were in front of me and placed an order for a hamburger and a cheeseburger.
They took their food and went to sit down to eat. Before I could even finish placing my order, the mother and her son came storming back and yelled at the cashier for messing up their order.
The mother, who had ordered the cheeseburger, had no cheese, while the son has cheese on his hamburger. The three of them could not rectify this situation, and the cashier apologized and had the order re-made.