Jokes 2

[nutmeg]

A guy stood over his tee shot for a long time, looking up, looking down, measuring the distance, figuring the wind direction and speed. All this was driving his golfing partner nuts.

Finally, his exasperated partner said, "Just hit the stupid ball!"


The guy answered, "My wife is up there watching me from the clubhouse. I want to make this a perfect shot."

"Forget it, man," said the partner. "There's no way you can hit her from here."

 

[hughb]

Quote from TGregg:

^@#%()(@! Warn somebody before you post that! Holy crap! I suppose they could have put black boxes over the naughty bits (those faces) but the gestures would have to stay.

And those teeth! A little too much mule in the bloodline.

She actually has a Wikipedia entry! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ursula_Martinez

 

[howellpar]

Here kitty, kitty. . . .

 

[Yannis]

News From Greece

Now, that's dedication to the hot issues of the day!!!

http://it.youtube.com/watch?v=v_KOK0wLmdA

 

[Yannis]

THE WORLD'S EASIEST INTELLIGENCE TEST

(Passing requires only 4 correct answers)

1) How long did the Hundred Years' War last?

2) Which country makes Panama hats?

3) From which animal do we get cat gut?

4) In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution?

5) What is a camel's hair brush made of?

6) The Canary Islands in the Pacific are named after what animal?

7) What was King George VI's first name?

8) What color is a purple finch?

9) Where are Chinese gooseberries from?

10) What is the color of the black box in a commercial airplane?

Remember, you need 4 correct answers to pass.

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Check your answers below.

ANSWERS TO THE QUIZ

1) How long did the Hundred Years War last? 116 years

2) Which country makes Panama hats? Ecuador

3) >From which animal do we get catgut? Sheep and Horses

4) In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution? November

5) What is a camel's hair brush made of? Squirrel fur

6) The Canary Islands in the Pacific are named after what animal? Dogs

7) What was King George VI's first name? Albert

8) What color is a purple finch? Crimson

9) Where are Chinese gooseberries from? New Zealand

10) What is the color of the black box in a commercial airplane? Orange (of course)

What do you mean, you failed???

Me too...

 

[sho-tim]

 

[CaptainObvious]

Quote from TGregg:

^@#%()(@! Warn somebody before you post that! Holy crap! I suppose they could have put black boxes over the naughty bits (those faces) but the gestures would have to stay.

And those teeth! A little too much mule in the bloodline.

Sorry I frightened you. She was quite animated.

 

[Lucrum]

On television today a Democratic operative pointed out that when Obama holds a rally 25,000-30,000 people show up, whereas when McCain holds one he only draws 10,000-15,000.




The Republican spokesman replied, 'That's because McCain's supporters are at work.'

 

[flytiger]

Quote from Lucrum:

On television today a Democratic operative pointed out that when Obama holds a rally 25,000-30,000 people show up, whereas when McCain holds one he only draws 10,000-15,000.




The Republican spokesman replied, 'That's because McCain's supporters are at work.'

Although I don't much feel like laughing, this brought a smile. thanks.

 

[sho-tim]

FIVE BEST THINGS TO SAY IF YOU GET CAUGHT SLEEPING AT YOUR DESK:


NUMBER 5: They told me at the Blood Bank this might happen.

NUMBER 4: 'This is just a 15 minute power nap they raved about in the time-management course you sent me to.

NUMBER 3: 'Whew! Guess I left the top off the White-out. You probably got here just in time!

NUMBER 2id you ever notice sound coming out of these keyboards when you put your ear down real close?

Number 1 : best thing to say if you get caught sleeping at your desk: (Raising your head slowly)'... in Jesus' name, Amen