Jokes 2

Somewhat Painful Puns

I don't enjoy computer jokes--not one bit.
I changed my iPod's name to Titanic. It's syncing now.
Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.
I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.
I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can't put it down.
I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.
They told me I had type-A blood, but it was a Type-O.
PMS jokes aren't funny; Period.
We’re going on a class trip to the Coca-Cola factory. I hope there's no pop quiz.
I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.
Broken pencils are pointless.
I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.
What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.
I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.
I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.
Velcro — what a rip off!
Venison for dinner again? Oh deer!

:) :) :)
 
Quote from nutmeg:

They say that laughter is the best medicine....

I don't think it will help erectile dysfunction.

:D
More...

Not when she's the one laughing and you're crying!
 
Quote from Yannis:

Relax And Remember
More...

I watched 10 minutes of the cartoon channel yesterday... Pfftttt..I don't get it.

<iframe width="420" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/0P49sLoe6H8" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>
 
The Concerned Blonde

A man got on the bus with both of his front trouser pockets full of golf balls and sat down next to a beautiful blonde.

The puzzled woman kept looking at him and his bulging pockets. Finally, after many glances from her, he said, "It's golf balls." But she continued to look at him for a very long time, thinking deeply about what he had said.

After several minutes, not being able to contain her curiosity any longer, she asked: "Does it hurt as much as tennis elbow?"

:) :) :)
 
Now I'm checking out the dust and dander index. Which brings me to religion, oh look at the bird....:cool: (add bigtime) :D

I remember a Sunday at church in my formative years.

The priest is doing a typical Sunday service, then he says "Lord, without you, we are all but dust"

I asked, "Mummy, what is buttdust?"

Church was pretty much over for me for that day.
 
Quote from nutmeg:

North Korea is now planning to test a nuclear weapon.

To which I say, please do.

Talk about a problem taking care of itself.
More...
My friend, I used to think you're bad, but now I see that you're terrible! :) :) :)
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top