in over my head & looking for input

[wrbtrader]

Quote from amex4:

you are totally missing the point. that is not what i am trying to do. i increased her account by $450K. i am legally entitled to half of that. however i do NOT wish to take it. based on the disparity of our incomes, my actual child support would not nearly be as much over time to the present value lump sum of the $450K.

i was just looking for folks who have had a possible similar experience in a scenario where they were managing their spouse's account, made them some equity over time, and a worst case scenario happened. what kind of considerations occurred...

1) Stop trading her account.

2) Start trading your own account just in case the worst happens (divorce).

3) If she wants you to continue trading her account...have her pay you a salary or fees pay to you.

4) Start saving your money in a separate account just in case the worst case scenario happens. Setup online statements only (no mailing of statements).

5) Persuade her to put the 450k (a bulk of it) from her trading account that you've been managing...put the profits into the child's college education fund or preferably a trust fund just in case the worst happens and then later a new guy comes into her life...wanting access to money.

 

[Redneck]

Quote from mgookin:

Your kid is sure to rot under a stepfather.

Being a stepdad of two boys.., I could take exception to this remark...

If I was insecure about being a stepdad… or thought I was somehow an inadequate dad

Since neither is the case - pffftttt

RN

 

[amex4]

Quote from RichardRimes:

Your priorities are out of whack...

1) Focus on your child. This is WHY you got married is it not?

Is it possible for this child to thrive in a happy household if you and your wife seek professional guidance on the issues you have? If you have WORKED hard to establish a good relationship with your wife but still are totally unhappy in your marriage and chose to file for a divorce then PUT YOUR CHILD'S WELFARE ABOVE YOURS. Hire a good divorce attorney and set up family divorce counseling.

Everything else in your post is just trivial.

good point - indeed it is trivial. thank you for your feedback. i agree - the priority and most important aspect of this is focusing on our child.

in terms of the marriage if you were to look at it on a chart right now, its hit bottom and has been making lower lows. so on the flip side, it should not be that difficult at this point to get some positive momentum going. i am definitely up for it.

my initial opening post was more of a kind of a what if? or curiosity scenario, say what if my wife wants to quit. i should have been more explicit and articulated better in that regard as opposed to making it sound like i am basically throwing in the towel this weekend which i am not. thanks again for your post.

 

[amex4]

Quote from wrbtrader:

1) Stop trading her account.

2) Start trading your own account just in case the worst happens (divorce).

3) If she wants you to continue trading her account...have her pay you a salary or fees pay to you.

4) Start saving your money in a separate account just in case the worst case scenario happens. Setup online statements only (no mailing of statements).

5) Persuade her to put the 450k (a bulk of it) from her trading account that you've been managing...put the profits into the child's college education fund or preferably a trust fund just in case the worst happens and then later a new guy comes into her life...wanting access to money.

this is exactly what i am looking for. just a grocery list of suggestions on how i should proceed if things can not be turned around. like i said; i am not quitting on this or my child and hope for the best.

i gave a very poor first impression and that was my fault. my initial post was really a kind of what if my wife wants to quit kind of scenario/inquiry --- what considerations would i be looking at. thanks again.

 

[amex4]

Quote from nursebee:



someone that can teach you how to write better.

come to think of it. valid point on your end. i do need some work on my articulation/writing skills. thanks.

 

[nonlinear5]

Quote from amex4:

i have been very blessed with a beautiful healthy baby boy and am thankful everyday. One of the big issues is that her dad is a heavy smoker. My wife's salary is nearly 3X my salary.

I don't get it. You have a healthy child and a wife who makes $270K/year, and you want to get out of the marriage because her dad is a smoker?