EZ - thanks very much for such a thoughtful response! I have many thoughts currently flooding the ole' cerebrum - hopefully I can express some of them here so as to appear at least partially coherent.
I'm a blue-collar guy - neither ashamed nor proud of - just the path I ended up on, having awkwardly stepped forward, away from the party-hardy college days. I never enjoyed workin' for the man, and although I gave small business a chance, circumstances beyond my control prevented those avenues from flourishing. Heard about something called commodities trading many years ago, and never could shake the idea, even after getting thumped a few times. I believe my life-long love of numbers was at the root of my fascinations.
Fast forward to a few years ago, when during an apparent mid-life crisis, I just said "to hell with it all" - I'm pursuing my own dreams and goals, and I will reach them, or die trying. Walked away from the best paying industrial job in our area (bye-bye big blue meatball) and have been in front of the screen ever since.
Sorry for the personal garbage, but this is now my 'job' (sans paycheck - haha) and I believe it is the reason I've allowed sim trading to take on such an overweighted importance. Unfortunately, it is hindering the very things over which I must prevail, in order to prevent the dreaded crash and burn (this is a'kin to being a WalMart greeter someday

) Seeing positive numbers day by day provides some type of 'false' proof that I'm on the right track, but the truth of the matter remains - it will mean nil, starting with Day One when I return to the live trenches. And this is the last go-round, so I danged well better be prepared!
I know I am well ahead of where I was 6 months ago, but I need many more assurances than that alone. Thanks to people like yourself, EZ, the guys in the Paltalk room, folks who have provided guidance, assistance and encouragement both publicly and privately,and of course, Spyder, whom we all greatly rely on, am I able to retain a positive attitude towards this most difficult endeavor.
So, it's back to the basics for this guy - today was the last day of sim trading for awhile, as I am returning to pencil and paper, and more thorough/ precise chart annotating. Hopefully I will begin to assemble the bits and pieces gathered to date, and be able to relay some aha moments within these pages. Or else it could get kinda boring around here - heheh.
All the best, folks ...