Quote from ElCubano:
Religion has not caused any deaths..not one death since the beginning of time was caused by religion
Religion killed my Uncle.
Seriously, he prayed every day, went to church every Sunday, helped out at nearly every charity event. On one particular weekend he joined his congregation on a field trip to build homes for the poor (disadvantaged) people in the Ozarks. I cannot remember the name of the town but while on this trip he met an Ozark women who had never been outside the village. For some strange reason he was attracted to her despite her lack of hygiene and missing teeth, well only a couple were missing anyway. Besides, he was lonely most of his life. His first wife passed away in a freak boating accident a year to the day after they were married. They had to have a closed casket and everything, it was awful. From what I heard there were barnacles everywhere. I am getting off track; he really liked Clarice, the Ozark women, and offered to take her into the city - Philadelphia, city of bells and steak sandwiches - where he had been living for two and a half years and show her around. Begrudgingly, she agreed. After the first day's tour she noted how self-conscious she was becoming, because a lot of dirty looks were being thrown her way. My Uncle told her not to worry, but when Suzanne the hairstylist from his church called that night to ask how things were going and he told her, she told him to bring her in for a "make-over." It took hours from what I hear, but that may just be someone's biased, and mean-spirited I might add, take on the matter. Anyhow, the wig was set, nails painted, make-up done and Clarice started looking much better. My Uncle was much happier with Clarice feeling better and offered to take her to a nice Italian restaurant, "Tony's," I think. It must have been the most extravagant meal of Clarice's life. My Uncle, who as I said had been lonely for many years, was very pleased to have Clarice, and she, not having had a man in many years, pleased to have him. I was young when I was told this, so I did not get to hear how the rest of the night went, but one can imagine. Clarice stayed the week, then two, and eventually four months passed before the blink of an eye.
It was August and the leaves were turning early, it had been a very dry summer and everything was a mixture of gray and brown mix. Pleasantly cool and breezy, not too exciting but overall a nice day for a wedding. I was six years-old at the time and very jumpy from having too much sugar and cider. My Uncle, being such an upstanding member, was allowed to use the otherwise expensive and very small yard back of the church hall. It was a steepled building that had been there for years and almost never renovated, real old-fashioned with real old-fashioned people who did all their own maintenance. Mostly painting, but everyone pitched in when they could and sometimes were extending themselves well beyond there know-how. Two years prior the cross atop the church had been struck by lighting and fairly tarnished and mangled as a result. The men who were most qualified for some reason or another weren't available, so the daring few who remained had climbed the fifty foot spire upon which the old cross was fixed. After only two days of work, one to remove the old and one to install the new cross, the men had finished their task and left the church with only a bill for the cost of the new cross.
When the wind began to pick up few, if any, other than myself heard to creaky, metallic sound coming from above, and since I was only six was not allowed to speak during the ceremony. Moments before Clarice was to say the oh-so-important words, "I do," a gust of wind began to take hold of the newly installed cross and most everyone took notice of what was soon to be a monstrous crash and devastating blow to the now severely interrupted exchange of matrimonial vows.
Nobody ran, there wasn't much place to go since the only exit was small gate down a rather narrow passageway. Nonetheless, most sensible people were disturbed and heading for safer ground. My Uncle, having himself aided his fellow brave souls in the placement of the cross began shouting. "STAY WHERE YOU ARE! That thing is bolted down, it needs some repair but can't possibly come off that roof." He actually said, moments before meeting his demise, "HAVE FAITH."
Religion. It killed my Uncle.
