Going Live

Quote from MAESTRO:
I have been practicing a brain surgery procedure for two weeks now on live patients. I used a very sharp Buck knife and some pliers. So far 2 out my 10 patience died but they were not that important to me (distant relatives).

I am very happy with my performance. I plan to practice on a few more live patients that I’m not related to get a better feel for my skills on a variety of different kinds of patients.

It's an out patient type of a surgery where you just cut a rear side of the brain.
I was actually very proud of my heroic efforts to make up for the initial loss of patients (yes - I know that is a bit silly, but I am still very proud).

The procedure is based on a few clamps that I found in my dad’s garage, a heater that I borrowed from my sister and a battery charger to make my patients paralyzed. It is merely the tools to cut the skull open and extract the right side of the brain.

This is my first effort at performing a brain surgery. Should I put anything else on my operating table before I start cutting my relatives? Do I need anything other than my surgery procedure?

Thanks,
Brain Surgeon
Damn funny piece.
So right.
:)
 
Quote from MAESTRO:

I have been practicing a brain surgery procedure for two weeks now on live patients. I used a very sharp Buck knife and some pliers. So far 2 out my 10 patience died but they were not that important to me (distant relatives).

I am very happy with my performance. I plan to practice on a few more live patients that I’m not related to get a better feel for my skills on a variety of different kinds of patients.

It's an out patient type of a surgery where you just cut a rear side of the brain.
I was actually very proud of my heroic efforts to make up for the initial loss of patients (yes - I know that is a bit silly, but I am still very proud).

The procedure is based on a few clamps that I found in my dad’s garage, a heater that I borrowed from my sister and a battery charger to make my patients paralyzed. It is merely the tools to cut the skull open and extract the right side of the brain.

This is my first effort at performing a brain surgery. Should I put anything else on my operating table before I start cutting my relatives? Do I need anything other than my surgery procedure?

Thanks,
Brain Surgeon
Maestro,
Did you perhaps fire your "genitor" that you now have to take care of the job yourself?
:D
 
Quote from MAESTRO:

I have been practicing a brain surgery procedure for two weeks now on live patients. I used a very sharp Buck knife and some pliers. So far 2 out my 10 patience died but they were not that important to me (distant relatives).
. . .
blah blah
. . . .
This is my first effort at performing a brain surgery. Should I put anything else on my operating table before I start cutting my relatives? Do I need anything other than my surgery procedure?

Thanks,
Brain Surgeon


Muppet post by a cretin adding nothing constructive at all to this thread.

At the end of the day, many views make a market.

If the Norm's comfortable with this concept and is prepared to put his own cock on the block then good luck and all the best.
 
Quote from nononsense:

Maestro,
Did you perhaps fire your "genitor" that you now have to take care of the job yourself?
:D

After trying all sorts of automated behavior control tools (some of them had pretty sophisticated remote controls and voice activation) a simple thought came to my mind: - “A genitor who does not parent the child is not its parent”. So, yes, I am taking care of the job myself and, yes, I have fired the “GENITOR”. Since then I started to feel a lot better despite increased radiation that I’m constantly exposed to (you know, 150 monitors, 6 huge servers etc). After all a Brain Surgery is not about knowing what to cut and where it is more about “WHY”. Thank you for cheering me up at the times when cheer is as expensive as Oil (February delivery contract).
 
Quote from A Dashing Blade:

Muppet post by a cretin adding nothing constructive at all to this thread.

At the end of the day, many views make a market.

If the Norm's comfortable with this concept and is prepared to put his own cock on the block then good luck and all the best.

Were you one of my patients? I should be more careful with those Brain Surgeries; sometimes I end up cutting the most crucial parts of the brain. Well, try to think with what you are left with. I feel that the remaining parts of your brain will eventually develop a rudimentary ability to understand humor.
 
Quote from MAESTRO:

blah blah . . . I feel that the remaining parts of your brain will eventually develop a rudimentary ability to understand humor.

"Humor" . . . so you'd be American right? Ha ha ha ha ha!
 
Quote from A Dashing Blade:

"Humor" . . . so you'd be American right? Ha ha ha ha ha!

What is the purpose of humor? why do we laugh?
Humor is a complex phenomenon There is no general theory of humor or even an agreed definition.
When we try to define exactly what counts as humor and what does not, or how humor operates, we find it quite difficult.
Humor is comprised of three components: wit, mirth, and laughter.
Wit is the cognitive experience, Mirth the emotional experience, Laughter the physiological experience.
We often equate laughter with humor, but there are many instances of laughter (tickling, nervousness, etc.) that clearly have little to do with humor.
Similarly, there are many instances of humor that do not result in laughter (due to the mood of the appreciator, the social context, etc.).
Humor is a quality of perception that enables us to experience joy even when faced with adversity.
Stress is an adverse condition during which we may experience tension or fatigue, feel unpleasant emotions and sometimes develop a sense of hopelessness or futility.
You cannot feel stress, angry, depressed, anxious, guilty, or resentful and experience humor at the same time.
Like beauty being in the eyes of the beholder, humor is in the funny bone of the receiver of the experience.

I'm not an American, but I wish I was.
 
Quote from MAESTRO:

What is the purpose of humor? why do we laugh?
Humor is a complex phenomenon There is no general theory of humor or even an agreed definition.
When we try to define exactly what counts as humor and what does not, or how humor operates, we find it quite difficult.
Humor is comprised of three components: wit, mirth, and laughter.
Wit is the cognitive experience, Mirth the emotional experience, Laughter the physiological experience.
We often equate laughter with humor, but there are many instances of laughter (tickling, nervousness, etc.) that clearly have little to do with humor.
Similarly, there are many instances of humor that do not result in laughter (due to the mood of the appreciator, the social context, etc.).
Humor is a quality of perception that enables us to experience joy even when faced with adversity.
Stress is an adverse condition during which we may experience tension or fatigue, feel unpleasant emotions and sometimes develop a sense of hopelessness or futility.
You cannot feel stress, angry, depressed, anxious, guilty, or resentful and experience humor at the same time.
Like beauty being in the eyes of the beholder, humor is in the funny bone of the receiver of the experience.

I'm not an American, but I wish I was.

Spoken like a true maestro, kudos!!
 
Hmmm

The brand of humour that you used was one of sarcasm-by-analogy.

This is fine when arguing with a professional or taking the piss out of an ideology, you see a lot of TV political comedians use this technique, often to great effect.

However, when used against someone who is genuinely seeking advise it comes accross as rude and boorish.

By the way, here's the web link you cut and pasted from
http://web.macam98.ac.il/~ochayo/what.htm
(just in case anyone was delusional enough to think that you came up with that all on your own)
 
Quote from MAESTRO:

You cannot feel stress, angry, depressed, anxious, guilty, or resentful and experience humor at the same time.

Could not disagree more. The original author has no clue.

Oh, and good catch, Blade.
 
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