Quote from ARogueTrader (AKA OPTIONAL777):
You failed in the practice of faith. Had you succeeded, you would still practice today.
When the doubts came, you failed to dismiss the intellectual relativistic doubts. It was a choice, as are most failures.
Failure occurs in faith when someone gives up, as the fox gave up with the grapes.
You could have simply said, it is not for me, perhaps it works for others, but you have all the anger and vindictiveness of a sour grapes mentality.
You will never know if you had only doubted the doubt, that faith might have revealed what you practicing faith for.
So, you quit.
I could call you a quitter, but failure seems to sum it up best.
I would be happy to talk to a psychologist about faith, as faith is understood in modern psychology not to be a lack of rationality. In fact it is accepted as part of human nature to come to know things via faith. Faith is supported by mainstream and balanced professionals in the field of psychology, neurology, neuro-psychology, physiology, etc.
Of course you can say you know more than all the psychologists about the mind and dismiss their findings too.
You on the other hand, if evaluated by a psychologists would come under the watchful eye of a trained observer of psychological problems for your lack of acceptance of faith as a viable means to come to have a relationship with God. Your anger toward theists would come under scrutiny as unresolved issues within your own life and your own life choices.
You would be seen as an extremist who is in constant need of reaffirmation of his chosen philosophy. Those who are extreme and in need of constant affirmation by minimization of other's and their belief systems are not deemed psychologically healthy. Were you content in your chosen faith, faith in science, you would exhibit tolerance and acceptance of others and their chosen faith, and would not ridicule those who had a different set of life experiences and conclusions.
Your persecutory attitude is obvious as some sign of pathology in this area, and my guess is that you snapped (a psychological term) during a time of crisis when you felt your faith left you down and latched on to the polar opposite approach to uncertainty out of anger, it is a childish and primitive response to seek out the polar opposite in times of disappointment and stress, and now are on some type of crusade against those who don't share you belief systems.
You have gone to the ultimate extreme of a true believer who fails, and must necessarily denounce those who still believe. It is a psychological necessity, for to honestly and thoroughly examine the current real possibilities of your belief system which are:
1. You were wrong to renounce faith.
2. You are wrong to embrace your current faith with such zealousness as to denounce all others as wrong.
could potentially lead to a psychotic break. I have seen it happen. You exhibit all the signs of the imbalance of one who does not accept that other people may be right, and not make you wrong.
You are unable to see or admit to the circular nature of your belief system, as it is wholly a product of the intellectual mind, and it stands untested by anything but the intellectual mind. You place yourself as judge of what is rational, yet your responses filled with sarcasm, smugness and bile are irrational in their intent.
There is no balance, everything is black or white, with no possibility of gray. You try to act like your mind is a computer, yet you lash out emotionally and vindictively. The more you deny your own humanity and attempt to cloak it under the guise of logic and senses only, the greater the split will be between the two parts of humanity, which are the intellect and the heart.
You are a broken man, and too proud to admit it to yourself. Your bluster and comments about how much money you make are necessary to attempt to build up a crumbling self-esteem.
Fortunately, there is recovery from your state, but it requires emotional honesty first. My guess is that you possible suffered from religious addiction, and have approached your concept of religious sobriety in an unhealthy manner.
The first step is to admit that you are powerless over life, that you intellect is not enough, and that you need help from an intelligence higher than your own.
Or you can white knuckle your way through life exhibiting anger, self superiority, and condescension toward those who have different life experiences, conclusions and opinions.
It is of course your choice.
My guess is that you will deny you have such buttons which are being pressed, and will take to the same type of attacks which reaffirm the pathology.
