Getting my act together

Quote from Bearbelly:

I am very jumpy trader getting out too early most of the time but I also get out even faster when it doesnt go my way so I am profitable. I saw some of your recent p and l's and thought I was looking at my own. $40 or $50 , sometimes more but the thing is the amount made does not matter. What is required is being profitable consistently. That is the only thing required. I know that if I can make $50 a day consistently I am on my way. If you are in a hurry to make money then you get yourself in a bind thats hard to get out of.
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I know what you're saying. Any profit is a good profit.
When I started back in August I made a commitment to myself to either get my act together and start making at least 2k per-month, or I'd forget about it and check out getting a big rig drivers license. I can't keep stringing along my wife and daughter with hopes and 2k a month holes that keep getting deeper.
I've given myself until the end of Dec. to make it happen. If not, I don't think it will ever happen.
 
Quote from austinp:

<b>gutsytrader</b>, I appreciate all you've written & shared inside this thread. Thank you for that.

I do have a question for you:

Say you were looking to hire a professional trader to manage your own personal funds. The first person to interview for that position is <i>gutsytrader</i> exactly as he is right now.

What would be your first and then lasting impression? What positive and negative points about g.t. would you write down on a piece of paper while evaluating this potential manager of your personal funds?
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Good question. I've answered it to myself a hundred times.

"This guy guysytrader doesn't have his act together. He has a solid plan but lacks the discipline and emotional control to see it through. If we give this guy our money he'll eventually blow up our account. Who else can we use to manage our money?"
 
Quote from gutsytrader:

........... When Justin left I really felt like I lost a friend. Maybe he couldn't make enough due to all the discount accounts he had. I wish he had stayed................
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Hey gutsy,

I have traded through OEC for the last several years - ever since they became an FCM in Sept. 2003. I completely agree with you about Justin R. He was by far the best Acct Rep/ Broker that I have ever dealt with. (And I am no newbie - I have been trading for a very long time and have had sizable accounts with more than a dozen major brokers during this period.)

I wonder why Justin left? It probably wasn't a money issue because he hasn't gone to any other firm. He is no longer registered with the NFA and seems to have left the industry altogether. Anyway, I wish him well.

And, I also wish good luck to you on your trading journey.

Happy Trading.:)
 
Having had a total meltdown in my discipline and emotional control this morning, I decided to write down on paper everything I could remember as it happened. In reviewing it I had a idea pop into my head.

When I was hanging out with the pro he didn't talk about much other than current market conditions. When he taught me he never had a position on. It'd be like "watch this, see that, and now here goes the market". When he had a trade on, he'd just chatter out loud "getting stronger, starting to weaken, conditions normal, etc." all the time while we were just watching the market. I had no idea why he was doing it since his assistant seemed to ignore him. I could see what was going on and long after I understood, he kept up with the chatter. Today, I finally figured out why he did it.

He did it to keep himself focused on the trade at hand and block out all the woulda, shoulda, coulda self-talk. Since noones home during the day I'm going to try the chatter method tomorrow and see if it has any impact. I couldn't see how it could hurt since my self-talk today just about drove me nuts. Obviously, I've got a long journey to go.
 
Quote from gutsytrader:

Having had a total meltdown in my discipline and emotional control this morning, I decided to write down on paper everything I could remember as it happened. In reviewing it I had a idea pop into my head.

When I was hanging out with the pro he didn't talk about much other than current market conditions. When he taught me he never had a position on. It'd be like "watch this, see that, and now here goes the market". When he had a trade on, he'd just chatter out loud "getting stronger, starting to weaken, conditions normal, etc." all the time while we were just watching the market. I had no idea why he was doing it since his assistant seemed to ignore him. I could see what was going on and long after I understood, he kept up with the chatter. Today, I finally figured out why he did it.

He did it to keep himself focused on the trade at hand and block out all the woulda, shoulda, coulda self-talk. Since noones home during the day I'm going to try the chatter method tomorrow and see if it has any impact. I couldn't see how it could hurt since my self-talk today just about drove me nuts. Obviously, I've got a long journey to go.
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My situation's the exact opposite--I have nothing to lose. Not that I'm rich or anything. But my job includes an apartment, I walk to work, work 6 hours a day, and the tax rate I'm charged is so low it would be like making at least 50k back home.

I have lots of time and if necessary, could live on $400/month. I have health insurance, and getting teeth done is cheap as well. Since I'm divorced w/no kids, my stress level is low. I walk 2 blocks to the gym and walk 1 block to shop. No car, no problems with fighting traffic, a pretty low stress job. But, I'm a bit bored with it--I must admit. I've travelled all over Asia, and want to come back to the USA someday--maybe. It sounds like it's getting rather ugly back home, it's funny. In the building I live in, there is a 24 hour restaurant on the first floor, it usually only has 2 women working there at night, but they never worry about getting robbed. Crime is super low here.

What I don't have is retirement, just what I place in the bank. But if I lose money, I can be dispassionate about it. It's like money I had when I was a kid, it's gone--oh well. But, I'd like to make a good bank account, I don't want to be Soros or anything, but a with a nice bankroll, life is much easier!
 
Q. "How do you know when you don't have your act together?"

A. When you've figured out what the markets doing and still don't make bank.

Today, I lost it emotionally and blew up my discipline. I'm sure my self-talk sabotaged me. Anyway, I'm too upset to keep trying to trade so here's today's summary.

10 min. after the open I started checking market conditions. Since the market started below yesterday's close I thought maybe we'd have a trend down day. The market dropped pretty steadily from the open. I noticed there wasn't any institutional activity. I thought where are they? They must have some stops in here somewhere. No activity. Around 8:55 ct with the market well below yesterday's low I started to see some institutional activity. It was setting up to buy. I saw a perfect setup for me to go long. Unfortunately the market was trading below yesterday's low so I decided to not take the trade. Of course the market started up. By the time it got to yesterday's low I was in full gear with the negative self talk. "How could you miss this? Rules are only guidelines, not cast in concrete. Get your act together or forget it." Anyway, I was so steamed about missing the trade I put on a long trade at 1339.25 (the low of yesterday). Of course it wasn't as a result of a new setup but as a result of my negative perception of missing the early move. The market moved back below yesterday's low and I got a pretty good setup to go long at 1338.25. I decided to ignore the don't go long below the low rule and put on another long. It moved up to 1339.25 and I thought it would stall because many large specs were pounding the institutional players. I didn't bail because I wanted to be patient and wait for a clear signal. The market came back down and eventually bounced around 1337.25. I had a sick feeling since I hadn't seen any signs of buying and I thought my breaking the rule was going to cost me some money. The market came up a little and then I started seeing some strength from institutional buyers. By this time my emotions were racing. The move started up and by the time it got to 1339.75 I couldn't stand it anymore. While I didn't see any signal I reasoned I should lock in something just in case the market came back down. Also, I said to myself you can use the second long to hold on and wait for the late exit so no need to worry. It didn't come down and when it hit 1340.50 I couldn't take it anymore. My self-talk came back "why wait for a late exit? This could be the top. Get out now. You've got some bucks. There's plenty of time left in the day for more trades". Well I exited the second long at 1340.50 and the market kept on going....

In today's trading I lost it after missing the best entry and took a poor entry. I then lost my self discipline and exited the trades early and lost all chance of having a big day. Some days I think I'm making progress along the road to becoming a fulltime trader.
Today wasn't one of them.

+125.42
 

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Quote from j_wentz1:

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Yes, you're in a wonderful position. I used to have the great job. 200k a year + bonus. Great life, wife didn't work, kids in private schools, vacations in great places around the world, plenty of money to max out 401k contributions, more money spread among mutual funds. Helped many people with the extra cash.

Now...

If I don't trade....I'll be broke in 24 months.
If I trade and lose lots....I'll be broke sooner.
If I trade and aren't consistently profitable...I'll be broke later.
If I trade and am consistently profitable but don't make 2k/month....I'll be broke, just a little later.
If I trade and am consistently profitable above 2k/mo., I'll avoid going broke unless some new crisis shows up in my life.

I know scared money can't win. How's that work when you're also scared to not win?
 
Quote from gutsytrader:

..
I've given myself until the end of Dec. to make it happen. If not, I don't think it will ever happen.
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write down your goald , break out it down to whatever time frame you are comfortable with, repeat it out loud every day to make it happen -Napoleon Hill

and never say never :)

look like we have a little ecry club here all we need is waitting for 40yotrader to show up
 
Quote from gutsytrader:

[B...

He did it to keep himself focused on the trade at hand and block out all the woulda, shoulda, coulda self-talk. Since noones home during the day I'm going to try the chatter method tomorrow and see if it has any impact. I couldn't see how it could hurt since my self-talk today just about drove me nuts. Obviously, I've got a long journey to go. [/B]
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look like you are not a charting guy so this may not work, what I do is busy myself with drawing up or down arrows on chart to mark the would have, could have entry, that way my mind is occupied with what is unfolding right before my eye only, at the end of day I scroll back and see how many arrows that mark correct entries, this is like having self evaluation process and believe building process all rolled into one. After seeing so many correct entries you will be able to quiet the doubter within and quicker and taking your trades.
 
Quote from gutsytrader:

I noticed there wasn't any institutional activity. I thought where are they? They must have some stops in here somewhere. No activity. Around 8:55 ct with the market well below yesterday's low I started to see some institutional activity. It was setting up to buy. I saw a perfect setup for me to go long. Unfortunately the market was trading below yesterday's low so I decided to not take the trade. Of course the market started up. By the time it got to yesterday's low I was in full gear with the negative self talk. "How could you miss this? Rules are only guidelines, not cast in concrete. Get your act together or forget it." Anyway, I was so steamed about missing the trade I put on a long trade at 1339.25 (the low of yesterday). Of course it wasn't as a result of a new setup but as a result of my negative perception of missing the early move. The market moved back below yesterday's low and I got a pretty good setup to go long at 1338.25. I decided to ignore the don't go long below the low rule and put on another long. It moved up to 1339.25 and I thought it would stall because many large specs were pounding the institutional players. I didn't bail because I wanted to be patient and wait for a clear signal. The market came back down and eventually bounced around 1337.25. I had a sick feeling since I hadn't seen any signs of buying and I thought my breaking the rule was going to cost me some money. The market came up a little and then I started seeing some strength from institutional buyers. By this time my emotions were racing. The move started up and by the time it got to 1339.75 I couldn't stand it anymore. While I didn't see any signal I reasoned I should lock in something just in case the market came back down. Also, I said to myself you can use the second long to hold on and wait for the late exit so no need to worry. It didn't come down and when it hit 1340.50 I couldn't take it anymore. My self-talk came back "why wait for a late exit? This could be the top. Get out now. You've got some bucks. There's plenty of time left in the day for more trades". Well I exited the second long at 1340.50 and the market kept on going....



+125.42
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Thanks for sharing your story!!!

Would you tell how you check for the institution activity ? I guess you analyze the data from ESignal service ? Thanks
 
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