One of the things I've learned since starting this journal is the fallacy of starting with 1 contract. Since I need x dollars to get by each month, anything less than that means I have to borrow more money to get by. For several months I was doing the 1-2 contract trades in hopes of building confidence. The theory was you can always scale up a successful strategy in the future. Unfortunately, since my bank account was still dropping, with each passing month I felt more pressure to get bigger. When I finally increased size, I had a couple of hits to my bank account (major car repair +2,200 out of pocket), daughter hit by another car (car rental +1,000 out of pocket, insurance deductible +500 out of pocket). I felt tons more pressure to make it happen. This led to me losing control and having a big losing day.
In short, I think it's better to go up to a minimum size you need to get by and put a little aside to grow the account over time. Had I done that, the pressure I was feeling would have gone down over time instead of up. Now that I've jumped through hoops to get money from just about every source short of selling my home, I decided to resume my trading with 3 contracts. At this size if I have continued modest success, I should be able to cash flow and put a little aside. Then when I want to add another contract it'll happen because the balance has grown and I'm ready for the next step.
In short, I think it's better to go up to a minimum size you need to get by and put a little aside to grow the account over time. Had I done that, the pressure I was feeling would have gone down over time instead of up. Now that I've jumped through hoops to get money from just about every source short of selling my home, I decided to resume my trading with 3 contracts. At this size if I have continued modest success, I should be able to cash flow and put a little aside. Then when I want to add another contract it'll happen because the balance has grown and I'm ready for the next step.