Fear of success

Quote from Girlpower:

I wonder for how many people this is an issue for in trading, because success in trading is financially life changing in many ways, and can easily push people into a world where they can lose their friends, not be accepted by a new group of which they are not really a part, cause envy in others and all sorts of negative spin offs as well as the obvious positive ones.

Curious what others think. Is it fear of failure that makes people trade scared or fear of success? or behaps a bit of both?
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I think it's fear of failure for most people. Most traders I know had other careers before they started trading and they were fairly successful at those earlier careers. In addition, many funded their trading accounts from what they made in the other professions. So to know you are successful at some given career and then take a risk where there are no givens ... it's not a given you'll make any money ... has to create a little bit of fear in most anyone who's normal. No one likes to fail, especially those who have known success.

As far as the "success" aspect you mentioned I think there are different levels of success and not all tied to financial gains. Personally I'm not out to maximize my income. Rather I seek a balance between making decent money and also having time to do lots of other things in life on a daily basis.
 
I am a male and I know that I both have fear of success and failure. I have self-destructed good opportunities in my life besides trading.

I'm about to leave a good job and fly "solo"--trade full-time for myself. There seems to be some hurdles that I can't clear though. I keep on doing the same mistakes preventing me from giving my final decision to quit my job.
 
I also wonder if we set our own glass ceilings, and when we reach them prevent ourselves subconsciously from going beyond?

Anyone experienced this?

Natalie
 
Yes, we do set our own limitations.
It is a matter of what we want out of life. Money or time. It is very rare to be able to have both unless you are born rich. Trading is an occupation where you can possibly have both. I think that is what attracts us all to it.
I think it is our need to reproduce that holds most of us back. If we are out pursuing the almighty buck, what time does this leave for family?
I also think the demands on us at this point are unreasonable. Everything is getting faster, to the point where we all want out. Information overload. We think we have missed something. And maybe we just "can't have it all"...so we would rather settle for nothing?
 
Quote from Girlpower:

I also wonder if we set our own glass ceilings, and when we reach them prevent ourselves subconsciously from going beyond?

Anyone experienced this?

Natalie
More...

One has to WANT to go beyond any "ceiling" he/she might set. To achieve success in trading is no small feat. And as an earlier poster mentioned ... what about someone who trades a 100K account successfully but then stumbles or even fails with a 500K account. As one achieves success they gain more and more self confidence IMO. So if one achieves his/her goals trading they need to consciously decide if they want to set the bar even higher. To do so would entail some risk which may or may not be acceptable to the individual.

In the corporate world I chose to plateau myself (which is like setting a glass ceiling) back in the late 80's so I could devote more time to trading knowing that I wanted to trade full time which I pursued in the mid 90's.
 
I for one have a fear of success - that is why I did not go into the NBA.

That, and the fact that I am a 5'5, skinny white guy.

But, you know what I mean.

:D
 
I believe we all have glass ceilings. Who sets them though? Was is what your parents said to you or, more powerfully, demonstrated to you as you were growing up, actions and beliefs you modelled, forming your world view? Was it the interactions with your friends, partners? What guided their views and glass ceilings? What role does the media (tv, commercials, movies, educational cohorts) play in forming that ceiling for you? How much of a concerted effort have you yourself made in deterimining how high or low to place that ceiling, when its transparent, when its translucent, and when its time to break through? Wouldn't taking action in this area force one to confront some difficult issues and force some choices? I bet that it would. And thats where a lot of people, probably, stop.

Some may agree that there are macro forces like the media that do play a strong role in conditioning consumers, not just on product selection, but in general on instilling values, expectations and lifestyle choices perhaps even in the aforementioned "Glass Ceiling". Good examples come from the trading industry itself, many times at odds with the internal elements of good trading.

The glass ceiling exists. If you agree, then if would be prudent to determine who constructed yours, and where you might be able to make changes.
 
Quote from Girlpower:

I was reading an article in a women's magazine this morning, which was talking about failing because of being afraid of succeeding. I thought to myself this is interesting indeed...

It does make me wonder, when very often we are our ow worst enemies and hold ourselves back from doing what we know we should, and simply not have the self-discipline to carry things through. I really could see direct paralels in this.

Curious what others think. Is it fear of failure that makes people trade scared or fear of success? or behaps a bit of both?

Natalie
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Natalie,

I think its a little of both based on what I have seen in athletics from Jr. High level up to International level competition and having close friendships with those that have played on the professional sports level...

those that wanted to succeed on the professional level...a few of them had to see psycho-therapist or sports psychologists to overcome the fear of success just to succeed or make it to that level of competition.

(It's not all about great technique)

In other words...this is one of those deep subconscious things that's extremely difficult to fix on ones own...

usually requires professional help.

Also, personally knowing some traders that have failed and others that are succeeding...

I would lean more towards the Fear of Success because of the self-sabotaging aspect.

Simply...I've personally known a lot of people that self-destructed prior to achieving success when they were just as good or better than those that didn't self-destruct and achieved success.

NihabaAshi
 
Quote from Girlpower:

I wonder for how many people this is an issue for in trading, because success in trading is financially life changing in many ways, and can easily push people into a world where they can lose their friends, not be accepted by a new group of which they are not really a part, cause envy in others and all sorts of negative spin offs as well as the obvious positive ones.

It does make me wonder, when very often we are our ow worst enemies and hold ourselves back from doing what we know we should, and simply not have the self-discipline to carry things through. I really could see direct paralels in this.
More...
Many self help book writters, including Anthony Robbins call it 'Self Sabotage'. Success has some 'linkage' to something that you hate or fear, and unconsciously, you sabotage yourself.
Many times I broke a relationship because it went too well (no, I am not a love junky :) )
I was badly hurt in a previous relationship that went very well, therefore, in the back of my head Good relationship and/or Commitment = pain.
Back in high school, in a sporting tournament, my partner and I were winning, and needed to win 2 more points to get to the finals. I remembered visualizing climbing on the podium, recieving the trophy, however, suddenly the fear of public speaking kicked in, and I let myself (and the partner) lose the game.
Sad, isn't it?

Cheers!! :(
 
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