Fear of Failure
- Thread starter facultus
- Start date
Quote from damir00:
from the YMMV fiile: find a way to put yourself in a situation where you *have* to make a choice between the thing that scares you and something that scares you even more.
A trading mentor of mine held me accountable by saying if I did not execute according to my written plan, I would have to get up at 3:00am and run around the block without a shirt in the freezing cold. To make a long story short, I'd rather execute the plan, take the trades, and manage it rather than get up to freeze my ass off outside because I "froze" during the day.
Bruce,
It is truly amazing how people do as you suggest. Fear of failure is so difficult to deal with. After a while fear of failure is gone because it has been transformed into just pure fear and all that goes with that.
To deal, a person has to be adult about stopping in his tracks and recognizing that he is defintely totally impaired. It is an incredible place to be. Beyond realization usually.
You have seen the consquences here of people getting really stuck with the consequences of their intentional irrational actions.
to train for and to work for years on these deep problems and consequences takes a great deal of effort and getting delt loads of crap from those who are in trouble.
Two paragraphs will paint a picture that clearly states what is at hand.
1. One consideration is getting to an understanding that all the consequences that have come about can be examined by the person completely and thoroughly.
2. The second effort that can be made is one that replaces all of this irrational crap with what is appropriate. This is a terrific process and is not limited to the bounds that anyone embarking on it can envision.
You have the picture. Why it will never happen for the vaste majority of people is that they just cannot avail themselves to the process required. Most people cannot recognize the difference between what they take into themselves as forms of information and the processes where they take forms of information into thenmselves as they go through "living" processes.
///
EDIT: RLB
///
People take themselves to fear of failure and then abject failure by a process that you are reading about.
Rarely do people ask how to get to their God given potential or personal power. Stepping outside yourself is a tough "process".
1. You go back and see the drama you wrote over time.
2. You decide to end it and write a new script (you define what you want) that empowers the rest of your life and also maintains it from that point on.
When someone asked here: "How do you trade this? (CHRS), if you are trained, you can suggest to anyone how to get the job done. But that person has to dump what he does now; get back to neutral and then move forward by going through a process to learn how to get the job done. I can post the pictures easily. what is difficult is to get a person to learn to fish.
Facultus failed to write 3. Was this fear of some sort?
"As things deteriorate, the energy that you tie up increases and, thus, there is less energy available for anything else but maintaining the drama you have created and it's corresponding pictures." Grob 109
I like this. So true of the negative in life everywhere! Is the self-starring melodrama of failure addictive?
Failure in trading is no different .. it does have more to do with the ego though? Its your worst pal .. it will be in there for the ride just to make things 10 times worse.
As has been said by others, write a new script together with mind set success pictures and 'kick arse' mantras! Now go to it!
One caveat: know the worst and clear that one away before all else. For my trading strategy I know the worst because I've assembled the relevant data to tell me that. Its NEVER anywhere as bad as your imagination if let loose on the worst .. it can manufacture blind panic!
So new script, mind set winning pictures and 'kick arse' mantras and mentality.
"As things deteriorate, the energy that you tie up increases and, thus, there is less energy available for anything else but maintaining the drama you have created and it's corresponding pictures." Grob 109
I like this. So true of the negative in life everywhere! Is the self-starring melodrama of failure addictive?
Failure in trading is no different .. it does have more to do with the ego though? Its your worst pal .. it will be in there for the ride just to make things 10 times worse.
As has been said by others, write a new script together with mind set success pictures and 'kick arse' mantras! Now go to it!
One caveat: know the worst and clear that one away before all else. For my trading strategy I know the worst because I've assembled the relevant data to tell me that. Its NEVER anywhere as bad as your imagination if let loose on the worst .. it can manufacture blind panic!
So new script, mind set winning pictures and 'kick arse' mantras and mentality.
you overcome fear of trading by taking baby steps. start small (1 lot)and trade small until you are comfortable in the knowledge that you know what you are doing. then increase slowly as long as you stay profitable. if you have a string of losses then lower size until you get profitable again. you don't learn to trade from a book. it is something you have to experience and your goal has to be to last long enough to learn the game.
most of the stuff you read in the psychology books is pure bunk written by people who are clueless about real life.
most of the stuff you read in the psychology books is pure bunk written by people who are clueless about real life.
No, I thought I had three questions to ask. I missed deleting the last question.
Very interesting thread here. I have viewed my entire life as a trend. Thankfully, it has been an uptrend. Higher highs and higher lows. The fear of failure and fear of success are very different yet, they are almost the same. That fear is really a fear of leaving the comfort zone (going higher or going lower). I refer to that comfort zone as "mediocrity". Many of us get stuck in that cocoon, and have a tough time breaking out of it. Years ago when I was a financial consultant, the fear of failure is what made me succeed.
Many of you folks have seen me repeat this mantra here on ET..."entry, stop, target, risk and reward". I follow that in every trade, and I have been applying it to everything in life.
"IT IS BETTER TO BE BOLDLY DECISIVE AND RISK BEING WRONG, THAN TO AGONIZE AT GREAT LENGHTH AND RISK BEING RIGHT TOO LATE."
I give no one credit for my success, and I blame no one for my failure. It is me who makes the decisions, and I am responsible for the consequences. When fear becomes so strong that it "stops" someone, then it has become a disease that attacked the heart and soul. When fear overtook me, I stopped what I was doing, and did things like:
Trading
- scale back my size
- reduce the number of trades I was making
- sometimes stop trading for a while (few days)
- review my personal trading plan
- read through my trading diary to see where I started to go wrong
Health & Family
- cut back of carbs, alcohol, cigars, etc.
- cleaned the piles of papers in the office, crap out of the garage and shed. Clutter perpetuates a cluttered mind.
- increased my exercise (golf, weights, swimming)
- take my cars out to get detailed
- spend extra time with my wife and son
- watch movies & re-read books that inspire me
Trading
- re-read my trading diary to see where I went wrong
- create the emergency / contingency plan, which is part of my personal trading plan. I start trading lots that minimize the fear, and take very quick (smaller) profits to satisfy the soul. I keep doing that until the soul catches up with the brain, and then increase the size.
- become VERY SELECTIVE & CRITICAL in my scanning. I will not take a setup or play, if less than 90% of my critieria is met.
- I use MSFT Outlook, and set alarms for 3, 7, 14, and 21 days. In a meeting reminder, I type a question to ask myself. Such as, "Are You OK?", "Are You Ready to Increase Your Size?", etc. etc. These alarms are set to go off during slow market hours.
I go through a similar "slump" anyhwere from 1-3 times per year, and every full-time trader I have met goes through the same thing.
If you're having a tough time getting over the fear, then you're in a slump. The first step to correcting the problem is admitting that it exists.
Good luck!!!
Many of you folks have seen me repeat this mantra here on ET..."entry, stop, target, risk and reward". I follow that in every trade, and I have been applying it to everything in life.
"IT IS BETTER TO BE BOLDLY DECISIVE AND RISK BEING WRONG, THAN TO AGONIZE AT GREAT LENGHTH AND RISK BEING RIGHT TOO LATE."
I give no one credit for my success, and I blame no one for my failure. It is me who makes the decisions, and I am responsible for the consequences. When fear becomes so strong that it "stops" someone, then it has become a disease that attacked the heart and soul. When fear overtook me, I stopped what I was doing, and did things like:
Trading
- scale back my size
- reduce the number of trades I was making
- sometimes stop trading for a while (few days)
- review my personal trading plan
- read through my trading diary to see where I started to go wrong
Health & Family
- cut back of carbs, alcohol, cigars, etc.
- cleaned the piles of papers in the office, crap out of the garage and shed. Clutter perpetuates a cluttered mind.
- increased my exercise (golf, weights, swimming)
- take my cars out to get detailed
- spend extra time with my wife and son
- watch movies & re-read books that inspire me
Trading
- re-read my trading diary to see where I went wrong
- create the emergency / contingency plan, which is part of my personal trading plan. I start trading lots that minimize the fear, and take very quick (smaller) profits to satisfy the soul. I keep doing that until the soul catches up with the brain, and then increase the size.
- become VERY SELECTIVE & CRITICAL in my scanning. I will not take a setup or play, if less than 90% of my critieria is met.
- I use MSFT Outlook, and set alarms for 3, 7, 14, and 21 days. In a meeting reminder, I type a question to ask myself. Such as, "Are You OK?", "Are You Ready to Increase Your Size?", etc. etc. These alarms are set to go off during slow market hours.
I go through a similar "slump" anyhwere from 1-3 times per year, and every full-time trader I have met goes through the same thing.
If you're having a tough time getting over the fear, then you're in a slump. The first step to correcting the problem is admitting that it exists.
Good luck!!!
Don't let failure be an option....You'd be surprised how far that attitude will get you in life!!!!!
Personally I think that most successful people have a high fear of failure. Hense the reason they drive themselves to the limit. And ultimatly get more out of life. The thought of being average actually makes them feel ill.
The average Joe is more likely to have a fear of success.
I call it the working class syndrome. The mentality that this is your lot in life and if you try and rise above it, you'll just get cut down to size.
Runningbear
The average Joe is more likely to have a fear of success.
I call it the working class syndrome. The mentality that this is your lot in life and if you try and rise above it, you'll just get cut down to size.
Runningbear