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Does anyone else get infuriated by this.....?
- Thread starter Hello
- Start date
When someone dies, the only people who really care are those in the first car or two behind the hearse.
Yet for some reason, maybe to give meaning to their meaningless lives, people glom on to deaths.
If they really gave a shit they'd be there for those who really experienced the loss after the funeral and all the buzz dies down. But they don't so they're not.
I think this is one of the more pathetic aspects of human nature.
Yet for some reason, maybe to give meaning to their meaningless lives, people glom on to deaths.
If they really gave a shit they'd be there for those who really experienced the loss after the funeral and all the buzz dies down. But they don't so they're not.
I think this is one of the more pathetic aspects of human nature.
Quote from Hello:
I know that this thought process is most likely irrational, but i get extremely angry when people talk about victims, or people who died as though they were good friends, even though they hardly knew them.
This dates back to when my best friend died in highschool, and i always remember how pissed off i was at all the people coming up to me and telling me what a good guy he was when they didnt even know him, i see this happening in the media all the time and it has been brought to the forefront by Gabby Gifford. I cant stand people who didnt even know the victim coming out and talking about what a good person the victim was when you know damn well they didnt even know them.
Does anyone get what i mean?
I am going to put a caviat in my will which says that when i die the only people who can talk about me at my funeral are people who dont like me, and that no one is allowed to talk about what a good person i was. It is all so fake in my opinion, id rather know that people hated me, as opposed to knowing they pretended to like me when i died.
I know that this thought process is most likely irrational, but i get extremely angry when people talk about victims, or people who died as though they were good friends, even though they hardly knew them.
I understand, I used to feel the same way, I don't anymore.
The minister spoke, never having met the person and I'm thinking to myself, none of us even know this guy or will ever see the minister again, why is he up there speaking? But ce la vie. What other way can we do this, let everyone have a turn, telling a story? Naw, story telling is for the viewing, or afterwards among each other. Would I have liked to speak and share a story? Probably, others might not, best to have a neutral person perhaps mention a few accomplishments and leave it at that.
I understand, I used to feel the same way, I don't anymore.
The minister spoke, never having met the person and I'm thinking to myself, none of us even know this guy or will ever see the minister again, why is he up there speaking? But ce la vie. What other way can we do this, let everyone have a turn, telling a story? Naw, story telling is for the viewing, or afterwards among each other. Would I have liked to speak and share a story? Probably, others might not, best to have a neutral person perhaps mention a few accomplishments and leave it at that.
If someone is self-aggrandizing (i.e. "name-dropping" on the dead if that person was famous), that's pretty pathetic.
Usually it just boils down to expressing empathy for something everyone has to deal with sooner or later.
Also, you have to consider that a person took time out of their day to even show up (assuming he/she wasn't paid to). Let's face it, there are plenty of other more fun places to be rather than at a service/funeral.
So if someone sacrifices some time to show some respect, the least you can do is not be an ingrate.
Usually it just boils down to expressing empathy for something everyone has to deal with sooner or later.
Also, you have to consider that a person took time out of their day to even show up (assuming he/she wasn't paid to). Let's face it, there are plenty of other more fun places to be rather than at a service/funeral.
So if someone sacrifices some time to show some respect, the least you can do is not be an ingrate.
Quote from nutmeg:
What other way can we do this, let everyone have a turn, telling a story?
...Would I have liked to speak and share a story? Probably,...
Every funeral I've ever been to was conducted exactly like that. First the Rabbi speaks, and then everyone who wants a turn says something about the deceased, so there are always about ten different people orating a few personal words about the deceased as part of the service.
I guess that's a Jewish thing? Are you saying that other funerals <i>don't</i> work that way?
No. Why get infuriated at people for behaving in accordance with their natures? These people just want to make you feel better, and naively assume that superficial sympathy will do the trick. They don't understand it will just piss you off. It's an honest mistake, with good/neutral motivations.
Their superficiality is no more infuriating than your implied demand that other people act and think just like yourself.
Their superficiality is no more infuriating than your implied demand that other people act and think just like yourself.
Quote from Hello:
I know that this thought process is most likely irrational, but i get extremely angry when people talk about victims, or people who died as though they were good friends, even though they hardly knew them.
This dates back to when my best friend died in highschool, and i always remember how pissed off i was at all the people coming up to me and telling me what a good guy he was when they didnt even know him, i see this happening in the media all the time and it has been brought to the forefront by Gabby Gifford. I cant stand people who didnt even know the victim coming out and talking about what a good person the victim was when you know damn well they didnt even know them.
Does anyone get what i mean?
Myself I'm already tired of the national media obsession with the gabby incident.
She's had her moment of fame it's over, now the tough part starts for her family,(also the one the media cannot sugar coat).
If the media were not irrationally obsessed with this story, you would not be bombarded with the silliness which you bemoan.
Quote from Ghost of Cutten:
No. Why get infuriated at people for behaving in accordance with their natures? These people just want to make you feel better, and naively assume that superficial sympathy will do the trick. They don't understand it will just piss you off. It's an honest mistake, with good/neutral motivations.
Their superficiality is no more infuriating than your implied demand that other people act and think just like yourself.
Yeah your probably right, and i know the thought process is probably somewhat irrational, maybe infuriated was a little strong, I probably should have said, annoyed, or irritated, that would have been a better description of how i feel.