To Coolweb, JMowery, Volente, maxpi, JA LDP, DannoXYZ, Gaphunter, Pekolo, blg01,
I am presently unable to respond to each of you individually, but deeply appreciate your having taken the time to read my thread and respond.
Coolweb: I enjoyed your 6 steps to success; they are classic. As far as joining a prop firm, I have investigated that. My choices, due to my location, are presently very limited, and I feel I must be comfortable with the style of the firm in order for it not to be just another failure, which I haven't found yet, after speaking to the couple of firms here. Relocating. as someone suggested, is not an option; that is my family situation.
Oddtrader: One might say I am a 'jack of all threads--master of none' except that I'm not even sure I'm the jack part. As I've said here, more than the compulsive gambler, which I really believe I'm not (notwithstanding Pekolo and others), I have out of greed and laziness failed to give the markets the respect they command. Overcoming those two vices is something, like JMowrey goes on to say, that must come from within, not from a shrink.
Volente: I have not read that book. From its title, I can see it's something I need to read, and will be doing so promptly, especially coming with the recommendations of successful traders.
Maxpi: I agree that it's almost impossible, at least for me, to trade and do edge searching at the same time. This is one reason that I am not trading real money right now, and will not, under any circumstances, begin again unless I have a backtested and forward-tested edge.
JA LDP: What you said is something I've told myself in the past. Every time I've 'run up' my account in the past, it has been through discretionary trading. Either I'm very lucky, or I have a decent feel for the markets; I believe it is the latter. However, discretion is a two-edged sword. Even if you've been successful for many days in a row, you're always nervous that you may just lose your 'feel', or that you may have just been lucky all along. Having a demonstrable, repetitive, edge, gives one the confidence one needs to take stops, keep losses small, etc. I don't think, for now, that it's a good idea for me to return to discretionary trading.
DannoXYZ and maxpi: Yes, I'm a pretty good self learner. But if I wish to succeed, I must clamp down on myself to follow through and see each project to its conclusion, instead of all these loose-ends that come back to haunt me.
Gaphunter: Thanks for having the guts to respond to this thread, despite my getting pretty beaten up. A lot of the mentors out there are traders who have never made it themselves, and have no demonstrable edge. Perhaps they delude themselves into thinking they are the "coach-but-can't-play" types. Perhaps they are simply crooks. Either way, they are too likely to blame your failure on you, when (in the mentor-guru scenario) it in fact comes from a failure in the methods. I think there are two types of mentors: 1) There are, truly (believe it or not) successful traders out there who help others for free. They do it, perhaps, as a way of giving back, or because they love the teaching. 2) Hugely successful traders who are willing to share their secrets for very big money (relatively), i.e. $25k and up. Perhaps they don't mind taking some time off, and $25k + risk-free money is something that even some quite-successful traders would consider. These guys who 'sell their souls' for somewhere between $99 and $5k or even $10k are usually making a living off their mentorship, and unless they can show you, in advance, their own consistently profitable account statements (I would say one year minimum), they're probably taking you for a ride. Not only will you be poorer; in the end you will be even more confused than when you begun. The two people I 'mentored' with, Scott and Bill, may indeed fall into the same category. At the time, the money they were asking for was very small, and I learned a lot from each of them, which, despite my present lack of success, has made me a 'better trader.'
Pekolo: What can I say? Thanks for your comments. I missed 'the bubble' because I was too engrossed in my 'real job' at the time to be able to trade. Actually, I don't regret missing it; I needed the time to invest in my other job, and trying to juggle both at that stage would have been disastrous. The two 'mentors' I had, IMHO, never really had (proven and successful) systems to follow, despite their claims to the contrary. Maybe I'm wrong about this. They'd say so for sure. But, as I said before, at some point, for me, I realized I'd get more from the market theory they taught me than from the (ever changing?) methods. I'm not too cheap to pay for a mentor. I regret my losses and have suffered as a result of them. I am still wary of paid mentors/gurus, and am not sure it would be a good idea for me right now to plunk $5 or $10 or more k down for the next guru to knock on my door. That's what I meant.
blg01: Doing as you said, getting a decent-paying 'mundane' job is definitely a consideration I have been actively exploring. I spent a good chunk of time recently making phone calls, knocking on doors, and sending out my resume. Strangely, I don't find trading deathly stressful, and when I'm trading well, it can be relaxing and enjoyable. I am not yet willing to give up on it, a) due to my pessimism about getting a job through which I can support my family (that is just the situation, I can't change it), b) because I've invested so much time and effort into trading and feel in many ways I have a really solid understanding of market behaviour, and c) because I perceive my lack of success as something within my power to change, perhaps with some help from other experienced traders. Having to go through this thread and respond and mull over it has itself done me much good.
Hook n Sinker: Laziness and greed, as I've said before.
Volente: You're right. One of the conditions of my 'finding and edge' is that it must have a pre-determined stop, which is very tough if you're trading off gut-feeling and intuition as I have in the past. My past edge may well have been my intuition, but even if it was, it is not a style of trading that I can continue.
Thanks again to all who took the time to respond, both on thread and by PM.
